As a mother of over five years, I experienced a rather unique situation yesterday — I unwittingly carried home a bag containing poop. Yes, a real ball of excrement, tucked away in a plastic sack like a precious little kitten.
You might wonder how I ended up in such a bizarre predicament. Let me break it down for you. My youngest is currently in the midst of potty training, and if I’m honest, I’m not exactly an expert at this whole toilet thing. My approach mainly involves a lot of swearing and frequent clean-ups.
My son, eager to wear underwear every day, has been a champ about it — until yesterday when he had a major accident at preschool. His teacher kindly texted me to inform me of the mishap and reassured me that he was cleaned up and doing just fine. What she didn’t mention was that she put everything into a plastic bag. Apparently, the entire contents, including the underwear and…well, you know, the surprise, remained inside.
When I picked him up, I saw the unmistakable plastic shopping bag hanging on the hook beneath his cubby. Assuming it contained just soiled underwear, I grabbed it without a second thought. After all, accidents happen, and my washing machine has a toddler setting, so I was prepared for a little mess.
My son, however, was adamant about carrying the bag himself. I resisted at first, thinking it was a terrible idea to allow a toddler to handle a bag of poop-laden underwear. But after five minutes of his relentless crying and pleas for “his bag,” I relented. He held it on his lap the entire way home.
Once we were back, I figured I’d tackle the situation before dinner. As I untied the bag, expecting only to find dirty clothes, I was greeted by the shocking sight of a sizable turd stuck to the cotton Paw Patrol underwear. I could hardly believe my eyes!
In a panic, I rushed outside to the dumpster and disposed of the whole mess. There was no chance I was going to try and remove a solidified turd from a cheap pair of pants. Absolutely not!
So, to all those who find themselves in a similar situation, let me be clear: always remove the poop. Or at the very least, give a heads-up before handing over a bag of surprises. A simple, “Hey, just so you know, there’s a little something extra in there” goes a long way.
Interestingly, I later learned that daycare providers and preschool teachers are required to send the soiled items home as is, for sanitation reasons. While I understand the logic behind this, I still stand firm on my pro-turd-tossing stance, underwear included.
If you’re interested in more parenting tips and stories like this, check out our other blog posts, including insightful resources on home insemination and pregnancy, such as this excellent guide on intrauterine insemination and couples’ fertility journeys.
Summary:
In this humorous recounting, a mother shares her unexpected experience of carrying home a bag filled with her son’s poop after a preschool accident. She emphasizes the importance of removing the mess before handing it off and reflects on the sanitation protocols that require teachers to send soiled items home intact.