I live with ADHD and an anxiety disorder, which are more common companions than I realized. My psychiatrist assures me that it’s typical to juggle both, making me feel less like a unique case and more like just another socially awkward individual. Growing up, I was that kid who blurted out seemingly random answers in class. My partner often likens me to a whimsical character from a beloved book series, and while it’s meant affectionately, it highlights how I often miss crucial social cues. It’s not just annoying; it’s downright awkward.
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I May Not Recognize My Weirdness.
In the series “Sherlock,” the titular character often disregards social norms. I sometimes wish I had a friend like Dr. Watson to nudge me when I’m acting strangely. There are moments when I’m blissfully engrossed in my thoughts, unaware that someone is trying to engage with me. Alternatively, I might have a delightful chat with someone, only to discover later that we’ve met before and I’ve repeated myself. -
But I Constantly Worry About Acting Odd.
Experience has taught me that I don’t always grasp social etiquette, and I dread stepping out of line. For instance, if I encounter my favorite barista at the mall, I panic: Should I greet her? What do I say next? Most people navigate these interactions smoothly, while I secretly hope a sudden emergency will give me an excuse to escape. -
I’m Not Ignoring You.
I have many quirks that can come off as disinterest. I check my phone compulsively—thanks to ADHD, my brain craves the dopamine hit from notifications. Even if I seem distracted, I’m still tuned in to what you’re saying. I might stare into space or look around for my kids, but I assure you, I’m engaged in the conversation. -
My Friends Share My Awkwardness.
From childhood to adulthood, I’ve always gravitated toward other quirky individuals. In school, I befriended the “weird” kids, and now, as a parent, I connect with fellow unique moms. Our homes might be chaotic, but we all embrace our eccentricities—whether that’s making our own kombucha or obsessively watching niche sci-fi shows. -
I Fear My Kids Will Inherit My Awkwardness.
Thank goodness my partner is perfectly normal, or I’d be really worried about our kids. I fret they’ll adopt my social quirks, like having niche interests that make it tough to connect with peers. When your child is fascinated with historical figures, like Alexander Hamilton, it raises questions about their friendships. -
I Have a Terrible Memory for Details.
When I say I forget things, I don’t just mean names—sometimes I genuinely forget people I’ve met! That barista I ran into? Remembering her name is a small miracle. I’ll struggle to recall your kids’ names or what you enjoy doing, and that realization makes me anxious. -
I Might Interrupt You with Random Thoughts.
My mind doesn’t always follow a straight path, which can lead to some unexpected interruptions. I might blurt out something unrelated during a serious discussion. This is part of my ADHD, and I hope others will just roll with it. -
I Offer Compliments with Genuine Intent.
When I see something impressive, I often vocalize my admiration, even to strangers. However, I second-guess myself afterward, worrying I may have crossed a line and made someone uncomfortable. -
I Replay Conversations in My Head.
After chatting with someone, I often replay our conversation repeatedly, agonizing over anything I might have said that could have come off as strange. I fixate on my perceived awkwardness, convincing myself that they must dislike me. -
I Struggle to Interpret Your Feelings.
My difficulty with social cues means I can’t always read others’ emotions accurately. For instance, there’s a person I know who seems standoffish, but I’ve learned she’s quite warm-hearted. Each encounter leaves me doubting myself until I remind myself that it’s just her demeanor. -
I Don’t Know When to Stop Talking.
I have a tendency to overshare, feeling comfortable in my little bubble. Casual acquaintances probably don’t need to know my kids’ breastfeeding histories or my obsession with quirky songs, but I sometimes forget that these details might be too much.
In short, being socially awkward can be challenging. Forming new friendships and connecting with strangers often feel like navigating a minefield. You may find yourself obsessing over every little detail, worrying about your children’s futures, or how others perceive you. It can be isolating, but remember, you’re not alone in this experience.
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Summary:
Being socially awkward comes with its own set of unique challenges. From worrying about how you come across to others, to oversharing and replaying conversations in your mind, the experience can feel isolating. However, understanding that many people share these feelings can provide comfort.