I may not excel in many areas, and honestly, I’m pretty okay with that. Peeling a hardboiled egg? I usually end up with half the egg white sticking to the shell. Sports? Not my thing at all. And math? Let’s just say my high school math teacher would be horrified by how little I recall. I also struggle to put together a stylish outfit without relying on Pinterest or a mannequin for inspiration. While I recognize my shortcomings, I generally shrug them off. Yet, there’s one area where I feel a genuine sense of guilt: maintaining friendships.
I’m a bit of a slacker when it comes to being a good friend. I often delay responding to texts, snaps, or messages on Facebook. I miss phone calls and sometimes promise to call back only to forget. There are times when weeks pass without meaningful conversations. If my friends don’t make the effort to pull me out of my home, they might not see me for quite a while. Sure, I might send a funny meme or comment on their posts to let them know I’m still around, but my engagement is pretty minimal. I keep an eye on their lives through Facebook, and as long as I know they’re managing without my constant presence, I tend to not reach out.
Let me clarify: I truly love my friends, and I think about them often — multiple times a day, in fact. If there’s ever a crisis, I’m there, ready to support them at any hour. However, when it comes to the simple act of checking in, I often fall short. I might see something that reminds me of a special friend and think, “I should tell her about this,” but life gets in the way. I find myself overwhelmed, buried under a mountain of responsibilities, leaving me unable to take on even small tasks like making a phone call. A phone call could easily take up half an hour, and that’s a chunk of time I feel I can’t spare.
When I was younger, I was a much better friend. I had the time and energy to indulge in long chats, pedicures, and fun nights out. Nowadays, I struggle just to keep up with the laundry (which is why it’s currently piled up and wrinkled in my basket). I’ve lost friends due to my tendency to disappear, and I can’t blame them for moving on. But those were the more superficial relationships. My true friends understand my quirks and know not to take my absence personally. They recognize that when I’m overwhelmed, my friendship maintenance slips down the priority list, and I resort to quick interactions like Facebook “likes” or brief snaps while multitasking.
The best part about my friends is their understanding nature. They don’t judge me when I flake out or retreat into my own world. The fact that I can step back without fear of losing them speaks volumes. I know they’re not going anywhere, and when I finally resurface, we’ll reconnect as if no time has passed at all.
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In summary, while I may struggle to maintain friendships, I’m grateful for the understanding friends who accept me as I am. With their support, I know that no matter how long it takes for me to reconnect, our bond will always remain strong.