I’m typically pretty laid-back about germs, dirt, and the everyday mess of parenting. My cleaning skills? Mediocre at best. I don’t adhere to an all-organic, non-GMO diet (let’s be real, I struggle to even make it to the grocery store). And yes, I might have indulged in a half-eaten candy bar I found in my car while waiting for my child’s sports practice to end. (I was starving.)
Despite my chill attitude toward the messiness of life, I completely lost it when I discovered lice crawling through my kids’ hair. While I don’t cringe at the thought of dirt or questionable food, seeing those live bugs in my children’s tresses was utterly horrifying.
Let’s be frank: lice are truly the spawn of the devil.
However, you will get through this. It’s going to be tough, but you’ll persevere.
How the First 24 Hours Unfolded
So, here’s how the first 24 hours after discovering the lice unfolded: After nearly gagging at the sight of those critters, I dashed to the local pharmacy to grab several boxes of lice treatment and sent a frantic text to everyone I knew who had dealt with lice, pleading for help. There was a lot of swearing involved.
Next, I called the nearest Lice Treatment Clinic and begged for an immediate appointment. (Their earliest availability was the following morning, which led to visions of our house being overrun overnight by a legion of these nasty little bugs.) I scrubbed our scalps with RID shampoo until my scalp felt raw, snapped at my spouse, and, after popping a Xanax, checked the fridge for sufficient wine supply.
In my frenzy, I began tossing out anything I deemed potentially infested. Stuffed animals? Gone. Throw pillows? Never liked them anyway. Soon, my laundry room resembled a mountain of coats and backpacks waiting for a thorough decontamination.
Victory at the Lice Clinic
The next morning, we arrived promptly at the lice clinic, ready to rid ourselves of this nightmare. If you have access to a lice treatment center, I cannot recommend their services enough—it’s worth every penny. Two and a half hours later, we emerged victorious, lice-free, albeit with our hair slathered in treatment oil and sporting stylish hairnets.
After fifteen loads of laundry, I finally exhaled in relief.
Lessons Learned
Amidst the chaos of our lice crisis, I learned a few vital lessons. First, lice outbreaks are more common than you might think; practically everyone I know has faced this issue. Second, lice are disgusting little creatures that feast on human blood. Yuck! Their saliva is the culprit behind the itching. Triple yuck!
Third, the nits (or eggs) are the real menace that can wreak havoc in your life. Getting rid of the adult lice is relatively simple, but the nits are stubborn little pests that cling on. Fourth, nit-picking is a dreadful task; hiring a professional for treatment is absolutely worth it. The staff at the clinic were not only effective but also calming—kudos to you, Sarah and Emily.
Lastly, rest assured, you will survive this ordeal. Of course, survival will likely involve at least one panic attack, several glasses of wine, and plenty of complaints to anyone willing to listen. You may even have nightmares about being overrun by bugs and find yourself snapping at your partner, “Don’t get too smug! You could catch them too, you know!”
And fair warning: your scalp will itch for days. Just hearing the word “lice” could trigger an itch that feels like a Pavlovian response. You might be scratching your head as you read this.
Conclusion
In conclusion, while lice are indeed a nightmare, you will come through the other side intact.
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