It was day five of severe sleep deprivation when I walked into a local coffee shop, looking like a zombie who had just crawled out of a grave. I ordered a triple venti espresso and hovered around the counter, eagerly waiting for my drink. When the barista called my name, I snatched that cup from her hand and gulped down half of it like I was at a college party. If you’ve ever faced mornings with a toddler and a baby, you know how crucial that caffeine fix can be.
Ah, sweet caffeine.
Once that first espresso shot hit my system, the haze began to lift. Feeling slightly more human, I decided it was time to tackle the day ahead. No, not just tackle—I was ready to seize it! Riding high on caffeine, I grabbed my keys and headed out to the parking lot.
There it was—my minivan, parked in its usual spot. As I fumbled with my purse, my coffee, and a drink for my partner, I flopped into the driver’s seat. I placed my drinks in the cup holders, tossed my purse onto the floor, and flipped down the visor to check for any unwanted chin hairs. It was a bummer to notice that the overhead light was out.
That’s odd. I didn’t even realize that could happen…
Suddenly, I caught a whiff of something off. I turned around to see if I had left a lunchbox baking in the sun, but it wasn’t there. Oddly, there was also no sign of the second car seat.
That’s strange. I could have sworn I had two kids earlier this morning. Shrug
Maybe it was the sunlight playing tricks on my sleep-deprived mind, but I started to think something was definitely off. The leather interior seemed… darker than usual. Mine is tan, right? Yes, definitely tan.
I might need more coffee. Or maybe I’ve had too much caffeine. Or—OH NO—perhaps I’m having a mental breakdown!
Panic set in, similar to those characters in horror movies where everything feels slightly wrong, and they can’t quite put their finger on it. Strange smells. Missing car seat. Odd interior.
But I had entered this car with my keys! Right?! I pressed the button to start it up.
Nothing.
I tried again.
Nothing.
That’s when I noticed a wallet-sized photo taped to the dashboard. That kid was undeniably adorable, and he was the right age, but he was definitely not my son.
Mardi Gras beads hung from the rearview mirror, and that’s when it struck me:
Holy cow, I’m sitting in someone else’s car!
Here I was, in a stranger’s front seat, with the door shut! I was using their cup holders!
What was I supposed to do now?!
The most logical choice would be to exit the car immediately. But I had just placed my drinks in their holders and tossed my purse on the floor, spilling half of its contents in the process. I panicked, scrambling to gather my things and make a discreet escape.
Gum, in! Water bottle, in! Tampons, in! Sippy cup, in! Time to get out of here.
I ducked out of the unfamiliar minivan and hurried across the parking lot, glancing back every few steps, trying to act casual. I reached my identical minivan without drawing any attention. Phew.
I balanced my cups on the hood and rummaged through my purse for the keys when, oh my goodness!
You guessed it.
By this time, the owner of the other minivan was getting inside, and I had to muster the courage to explain, “Hi, I was just sitting in your car for a moment, trying to go home, and I left my keys behind.”
And then, it got good.
She burst into genuine laughter, her amusement ringing through the air. She had seen me in her car and was probably debating whether to call the authorities or wait to see how this played out. Fortunate for me (I think?), I managed to escape just seconds before she decided to report me for attempting to steal her vehicle.
Thank goodness I didn’t end up behind bars that day. It turns out sleep deprivation could have led me to a jail cell. Instead, I made a new friend, a kind-hearted mom with a little boy who was the same age as mine—and bonus? She also had fantastic taste in minivans.
If you’re curious about more parenting stories, check out our other blog posts here. You can also visit Make a Mom for more insights on home insemination, or explore CCRM IVF’s blog for excellent resources on pregnancy.
In summary, a caffeine-fueled mishap almost landed me in jail due to sleep deprivation, but instead, I found a new friend and a funny story to tell.