If you’ve ever shared a living space with a roommate, you’re likely familiar with the typical horror stories—those awkward and infuriating moments that come with communal living. Imagine dealing with someone who constantly lacks consideration, like using all the hot water right before your shower or finishing the last of the milk when you’re craving cereal. If your roommates behaved like that regularly, you’d probably be looking for a new place faster than you can say “roommate search.”
But no one warns you that kids are, without a doubt, the worst housemates imaginable. Good thing we love them, as children seem to dedicate their lives to behaviors that would be completely intolerable from any other roommate. Picture how frustrated you would be if you caught a “normal” roommate engaging in activities your kids do daily, such as:
- Running through the house in the nude
- Lounging on the couch without any clothes, bare skin on the cushions
- Standing in front of windows, completely undressed (hello, neighbors!)
- Leaving the front door wide open, letting out all that “bought air”
- Keeping every light on, even those in closets
- Surprising you with unflushed surprises in the toilet
- Devouring all your snacks—even the “good stuff” you thought you hid away
- Taking bites out of apples or other food items, then putting them back in the fridge
- Licking the cream out of Oreos or scavenging the marshmallows from cereal
- Leaving empty food containers deceptively in the pantry
- Dispersing wrappers throughout the house, even tucked between couch cushions
- Inviting friends over and just expecting you to feed (and tolerate) them
- Marching into your bedroom or the bathroom without so much as a knock
- Leaving toothpaste crusted in the sink
- Creating puddles on the floor after bath time, despite a bath mat being right there
- Being obnoxiously loud at all times
- Engaging in heated arguments over trivial matters with you and other housemates
- Taking over the TV with nonsensical shows
- Using up all the tape, Band-Aids, and Post-it Notes
- Consuming all the soap and shampoo
- Draining shared data and resources
- Hoarding food in their rooms that eventually rots and develops an awful stench
- Leaving dirty clothes strewn everywhere
- Expecting you to do their laundry
- Never showing gratitude for doing their laundry or cleaning up after them
- Rummaging through your personal belongings noisily
- Leaving your drawers ajar
- Asking intrusive questions about your life
- Tracking mud all over the house, then not wiping it up
- Keeping their rooms in a state that requires a hazmat suit to enter
- Waking you up at odd hours for various unpleasant reasons
- Constantly requesting to share your bed
- Bringing home stray animals with issues like fleas or mange
- Interrupting important phone calls
- Using the last of the toilet paper without replacing the roll
- Listening to the same songs on repeat
- Crying loudly at the drop of a hat
- Whining about even the simplest household chores
- Never contributing a single cent
It’s hard to fathom living with a roommate who exhibits any of these behaviors for an extended period, yet here we are—putting up with these maddening habits while bending over backward to ensure our raucous little roommates are happy and well cared for. Such is the transformation that comes with parenthood.
Lucky for them, right?
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Summary:
Kids can be the most challenging roommates, exhibiting behaviors that would drive any typical housemate mad. From running around naked to leaving a trail of messes and consuming all the snacks, these actions are only tolerated because of the love we have for them. Parenting changes everything, making us willing to overlook these frustrating habits.