What Were You Wearing? Exhibit Challenges Victim Blaming

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Picture this: a simple outfit—red leggings and a white T-shirt. That was my attire on a fateful night in 1985 when I was just 15 years old. You might be imagining the fit of my clothes or wondering if I was showing too much skin, but does it really matter? Absolutely not.

In cases of sexual assault, the only question that holds weight is whether consent was given. Yet, thanks to the toxic environment of rape culture—where sexual violence is often normalized—many believe that a victim’s clothing plays a role in the assault. This misguided notion leads to a focus on the victim’s attire, behavior, or even the amount of alcohol consumed, while the real culprit—the attacker—is conveniently ignored. Classic victim-blaming nonsense.

A powerful exhibit at the University of Kansas, titled “What Were You Wearing?” aims to bust this myth wide open. It features 18 outfits worn by individuals during their assaults, accompanied by their personal stories. Curated by the university’s Sexual Assault Prevention and Education Center, this exhibit serves as a stark reminder that what someone wears is utterly irrelevant to the reasons behind their assault.

From a simple T-shirt and jeans to a child’s dress, each outfit silently addresses the same question, urging viewers to recognize that the outcome remains unchanged, irrespective of how much skin is covered. Sadly, victims who muster the courage to report these crimes often face the intrusive question, “What were you wearing?” It’s a question that rarely surfaces in conversations about male victims, as highlighted by a male participant in the exhibit.

We need more initiatives like this because, alarmingly, a sexual assault occurs every 98 seconds in America, yet only 1 in 3 assaults are reported. The cycle of victim-blaming begins when survivors are interrogated about their clothing choices, drinking habits, or sexual history, diverting the focus from the only true source of rape: the rapist.

Victims frequently internalize this blame, leading to feelings of shame and self-doubt. When they ask themselves, “Did I do something to provoke this?” it discourages reporting and allows more rapists to evade justice. This cycle perpetuates a culture of silence and shame.

There are no conditions that should define an act as sexual assault other than the absence of consent. Conversations that scrutinize a victim’s circumstances—“Oh, you were wearing loose clothing and sober when it happened? Then we can label it as rape”—are not acceptable.

The prevalence of this culture is concerning, especially with public figures who have openly boasted about their predatory behavior. For instance, a well-known individual has claimed that physical appearance is a factor in determining the legitimacy of sexual assault, sending a dangerous message.

Even high-profile figures in the music industry have fallen victim to this mentality. For example, a famous singer once stated she took full responsibility for her own assault, perpetuating the harmful belief that a woman’s clothing and state of mind can mitigate the responsibility of the attacker. No, that’s not how it works.

Society must shift its focus to the question, “What can I do to help?” rather than “What were you wearing?” The latter is not only irrelevant but also damaging and ignorant. Exhibits like “What Were You Wearing?” work to dismantle the misconception that victims bear any responsibility for their assailants’ actions. By removing blame and shame from the conversation, we empower victims to report their experiences and begin their healing journey without fear.

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