I experienced the tumult of the 2016 election firsthand and it became crystal clear why the term “internalized misogyny” exists. I watched as women across America waltzed into voting booths, seemingly armed with matches, ready to ignite the last half-century of progress we’d fought so hard to achieve. It was disheartening to see those same women dismiss the strides toward Women’s Equality, as if we could just take a number and wait our turn to speak for the next three years. (Spoiler: Not gonna happen.)
After witnessing this unfold, my initial anger gave way to a chilling numbness—a defense mechanism, perhaps, but an effective one. Because honestly, nothing surprises me anymore. Well, almost nothing.
This week, however, a friend sent me a link to a Facebook page that struck me as outrageous. “Can you believe this woman?” she asked, which I took as rhetorical until I clicked through.
“The Transformed Wife” might as well be called “A Comedic Showcase of Female Self-Denial” because it feels like this woman has mastered the art of self-oppression. It’s hard to fathom what she believed before her so-called transformation, but her current persona resembles a cartoonish ’60s housewife—complete with a perfectly cooked turkey, an apron, and a bright red lipstick smile.
It’s a humorous image, intended to be a joke, because who actually subscribes to the “Make Me a Sandwich” mentality anymore? Apparently, some do. Enter: The Transformed Wife, who questions the sanity of women who invest heavily in education, suggesting instead they should focus on being “keepers at home with meek and quiet spirits.” Yes, you read that right.
This woman is serious about her “keeper of the home” ideology, and she takes aim at everyone from ambitious college students to working moms—and even those who dare to decline their husbands in the bedroom. It’s shocking to see someone use scripture to justify marital rape, but here we stand.
Her page is a cesspool of dangerous misogyny, all cloaked in a distorted version of Christianity that, as someone who believes in Jesus, I find hard to digest. Yet, shockingly, she has quite the following.
With that, let me present evidence as to why feminism is crucial. Exhibit A: Marital rape is justified. Exhibit B: Why do women think they know more than men? Do we have something to prove? Exhibit C: Should a woman remain at home if she’s more educated than her partner? Spoiler alert: According to The Transformed Wife, smart women need to get back to the kitchen and zip it.
I could continue this line of reasoning all day. There are countless examples where this nonsense proliferates, but I’d rather not get distracted from my own domestic duties while typing this. Silly women, right? We need reminders sometimes.
I used to question why feminists were so angry. But now I understand. The wage gap, alarming rates of domestic violence, and the skyrocketing costs of childcare make the fight for gender equality emotionally draining. And sometimes, to make matters worse, we find ourselves battling against our own. Women who have internalized their oppression and are unwilling to break free. Misery truly loves company.
At first, I was puzzled by The Transformed Wife’s significant following. But then it dawned on me: some of her ideas resonate with certain women. Wrapped in relatable language, her message of religious submission finds a cozy home in the hearts of some.
There are indeed women who find joy in traditional roles, supporting their husbands and raising children. They deserve applause, and I say, “Brava!” Pursue your happiness, mamas! Conversely, there are career-driven women whose professions fulfill them and enrich their roles as mothers; they too deserve recognition.
As feminists, what we ultimately want is simple: for every woman, regardless of her path, to have equal opportunities to pursue her joy without judgment. Even if that means allowing individuals like The Transformed Wife to share their misguided beliefs.
Maybe someday, she’ll step out from the patriarchal cage she’s built around herself. And when she does, she can thank feminists. While she focused on locking women away, we were busy gathering the keys to freedom.
For more on this topic, check out this insightful article about home insemination, or visit Cryobaby at Home Insemination Kit for valuable resources. The CDC offers an excellent overview of pregnancy that can be quite helpful as well.
In summary, the existence of individuals like “The Transformed Wife” underscores the ongoing necessity for feminism. It’s a reminder that the fight for women’s rights is far from over, as we continue to navigate both external and internal battles for equality.