Parenting
By Jamie R. Walker
She looked utterly drained. Completely worn out. Overwhelmed and frazzled, but mostly just exhausted.
Of course she was. With four kids, all under the age of 10, and a newborn in her arms who was wailing as if the grocery store was the worst place imaginable, it was no wonder. As I strolled through the frozen food aisle, child-free and basking in the glory of my own parenting journey, I couldn’t help but feel for her. I approached this beleaguered mom and said, “Your family is beautiful! You’re doing an incredible job bringing them all out here, especially with a newborn.”
She paused, her eyes glistening as she blinked away tears, momentarily distracted by the frozen waffles. I could sense she was struggling to contain everything she wanted to express but instead resorted to the universally accepted shorthand among mothers. Looking at me with a weary smile, she said, “I’m tired.”
I knew exactly what that meant. It wasn’t just about a bad night’s sleep.
When mothers utter the phrase “I’m tired” to their partners, friends, or even strangers, it carries so much more weight.
- “I’m tired” translates to the overwhelming burden of being the primary caregiver to small children day in and day out, which can feel utterly soul-crushing.
- “I’m tired” means there are moments when I feel like I can’t possibly go on for another second.
- “I’m tired” means that the reality of parenting has turned out to be far harder than I ever imagined.
- “I’m tired” signifies that not only am I sleep-deprived, but I also can’t fathom when I’ll ever catch up on rest—when will that day come?
- “I’m tired” reflects the frustration of having to cut the crusts off yet another peanut butter and jelly sandwich, contemplating whether I might just stab my hand in the process.
- “I’m tired” means I’m not in the mood for intimacy. It’s not that I don’t love my partner; it’s just that my fatigued mind can’t switch gears to that level of connection.
- “I’m tired” signifies the inability to engage in small talk with anyone—be it at the grocery store, the playground, or even a PTA meeting. The very thought of chatting with someone else who is just as tired feels like climbing a mountain.
- “I’m tired” also means please don’t tell me I’ll miss this chaotic phase one day. While that might be true, it offers me no comfort in this moment.
- “I’m tired” reveals a sense of loss for the old me—my pre-mom body, carefree attitude, free time, and solitude, all of which feel like distant memories I’m still trying to adjust to.
- “I’m tired” makes me wonder if I’ll ever reclaim my sense of self or if this state of exhaustion will be my new normal.
- “I’m tired” simply means I am exhausted. I can’t manage to do the mundane adult things that I’m supposed to be handling because, ironically, I’m the adult now—the mother, the one who sacrifices, who somehow needs to have it all together, but can’t seem to do anything right.
I gave this weary mom a gentle pat on the shoulder. I didn’t offer clichés about how it would get better or how lucky she was; instead, I looked her in the eye, smiled gently, nodded, and said, “I get it.”
And she smiled back.
Sometimes, all we “I’m tired” moms need is to know we’re not alone in our exhaustion. The realization that there’s a sisterhood of physically, emotionally, and mentally drained mothers out there can provide a comforting sense of camaraderie. We all understand what’s behind that simple phrase, and together, we can hope that it won’t be our answer forever.
If you want to explore more about parenting, check out this other blog post. And for those seeking more information on home insemination, Make a Mom is a fantastic authority on the subject. Additionally, Women’s Health provides excellent resources regarding pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, when moms say “I’m tired,” it’s a profound expression of the emotional and physical toll of motherhood. It’s a declaration of shared struggles, a call for understanding, and a reminder that we’re all in this together.