Maternity leave is a treasured time. After navigating the challenges of pregnancy while managing a full-time job, you’ve rightfully earned those precious weeks to bond with your baby. Congratulations are in order! However, this period comes with its own set of challenges. Not only do you have a newborn relying on you, but you are also expected to juggle the demands of family and friends. Why is it that new mothers often face such pressure when all they want is to enjoy their time with their little one?
During my pregnancy, I encountered unwanted touching, unsolicited advice, and a barrage of expectations that added to the emotional rollercoaster. To fully enjoy my maternity leave and embrace the newborn phase, I found myself setting firm boundaries. While I may have upset some people along the way, there are several things I will never apologize for during this transformative time:
Holding My Baby
It’s astonishing that new mothers are sometimes accused of “hogging” their own child. Let’s be clear: a mother cannot monopolize her baby. That little one is hers, and during maternity leave, there is no obligation to share. I understand the excitement that comes with a newborn, but if I wish to hold my baby, I will. I won’t accept any guilt for wanting to bond with my child. Maternity leave is a crucial time for both mother and baby, and this connection is paramount. When my sister-in-law lamented about not getting enough time with the baby, I firmly reminded her, “There’s no competition here; I’m the mom, and I’ve already won.”
The Courtesy Call Rule
Having a new baby is thrilling, but unexpected visitors can turn that joy into chaos. I firmly established a rule requiring a 10-15 minute notice before any guests arrive. If someone disregards this, I am not afraid to send them packing. My own mother has a tendency to break this rule, but when she does, I kindly remind her: “Charge your phone and call ahead.” This may sound harsh, but I have a loud dog and a potential disaster waiting to happen. The last thing I need is a surprise guest when I’m in the middle of a nursing session or a much-needed nap. It’s far better when visits are planned and anticipated.
Not Treating My Baby Like a Toy
I understand that many gifts for newborns come with good intentions, but I will not apologize for not dressing my baby in every cute outfit gifted to us. For instance, relatives would often inquire why my baby wasn’t wearing the adorable sweater-dress they bought. However, those 0-3 month outfits are impractical; they’re often uncomfortable and short-lived due to various messes. If I didn’t choose it or add it to my registry, I probably don’t expect to use it. Each moment with my baby is special, and I want to spend it comfortably, without the pressure of adhering to an unrealistic wardrobe.
As maternity leave flies by, it’s crucial to prioritize your own needs and those of your baby. This time is a gift, and embracing it unapologetically is essential for new moms. For more insights on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource.
In summary, maternity leave should be a time of bonding without the burden of external expectations. Mothers should feel empowered to create boundaries that allow them to fully enjoy this precious time.