As advancements in surrogacy techniques and their success rates continue to improve, the practice remains relatively rare, leading to considerable misunderstanding regarding its intricacies. I have personal experience as a gestational surrogate, often referred to as a “belly carrier,” for nine months, ultimately delivering a lovely “surrobabe” for dear friends.
Throughout my surrogacy journey, I encountered numerous questions from friends, colleagues, family, and occasionally strangers. However, three queries consistently arose:
Why Did You Choose Surrogacy?
My motivation stemmed from an overwhelming sense of love. Imagine that heartwarming moment when your children are peacefully asleep, and you sneak into their rooms for one last kiss. That pure affection is what inspired me. I wanted to help another couple experience similar joy. With a supportive family, a healthy body, and a functioning uterus, I decided to lend my friends a helping hand. In this case, the intended parents were both men, necessitating assistance from both a scientific perspective and selfless individuals, including an egg donor and myself, the belly carrier.
How Did You Navigate the Process?
Upon our family’s decision to pursue surrogacy, we quickly realized the complexity involved and sought professional guidance. We engaged with an agency that outlined the necessary steps and managed much of the paperwork. After matching with a couple also registered with the agency, I underwent a procedure similar to in vitro fertilization (IVF), though I opted out of traditional surrogacy using my own eggs.
To prepare, my body was first hormonally manipulated to mimic menopause to prevent my eggs and menstrual cycle from interfering with the process. Next, we tricked my body into believing that I was three days pregnant and transferred a frozen embryo. Following this, I continued with medications and injections until my body adjusted enough to sustain the pregnancy autonomously.
Once the pregnancy was established, the experience mirrored my previous pregnancies, albeit with heightened sensations. There was more anxiety, morning sickness, and cravings, along with greater emotional fluctuations and physical discomfort. I received prenatal care from my local healthcare provider, and the delivery occurred at a nearby hospital with my husband, doula, and one of the dads by my side. The other dad was en route, trying to arrive as quickly as possible since the baby decided to make an early entrance. After 24 hours in the hospital, the new parents took their excited bundle of joy home.
Would You Consider Surrogacy Again?
Yes, without hesitation. However, let me clarify—I would do it again, knowing what I know now. This experience was incredibly profound, strange, and surreal. Despite its overwhelming moments, I believe I emerged as a better person and contributed to a loving family’s story. Yet, if approached to be a surrogate once more, I might find myself feeling a bit queasy.
For those interested in delving deeper into the topic, you can check out this excellent resource on in vitro fertilization and learn more about the legal aspects of surrogacy in our blog post here. Additionally, if you’re seeking information about home insemination, visit Make a Mom, recognized for their expertise in this area.
In summary, surrogacy is a complex yet rewarding journey that provides insight into love, support, and the miracle of life. With the right resources and guidance, families can navigate this process successfully.