By: Ashley Monroe
Updated: Feb. 20, 2023
Originally Published: Feb. 20, 2023
A few months ago, my partner and I decided to separate, and it felt like a bolt from the blue. After 15 years of marriage, I was unprepared for the emotional fallout. In seeking support, I connected with others who had traversed similar paths, some anticipating the change and others caught off guard, like me. No matter the circumstances, the emotional upheaval that accompanies divorce is undeniably profound. Drawing from my experience and conversations with friends, I offer some insights for those in the early stages of divorce.
1. Prioritize Self-Protection
The emotional whirlwind can be overwhelming, making it crucial to avoid hasty decisions driven by pain or anger. This is a pivotal moment in your life, and rushing to conclude matters can have lasting implications. If you’re feeling vulnerable, enlisting a trusted friend or a professional can be invaluable. They can advocate on your behalf, ensuring you make decisions from a place of strength rather than desperation. Additionally, if there’s any risk to your safety or that of your children, know that resources are available to help you navigate those challenges.
2. Limit Direct Communication
Soon after the separation, my ex reached out to discuss the divorce. I assumed a conversation would lead to understanding. However, it quickly devolved into conflict. To protect myself, I decided to communicate solely in writing moving forward. This approach not only established a record of our exchanges but also minimized emotional volatility. Avoid phone calls, where misunderstandings can easily escalate. Instead, utilize email or text to maintain clarity and boundaries.
3. Redefine Relationships
It’s essential to recognize that your ex is no longer your primary support system. While they might have played significant roles in your life, their capacity to provide emotional support is now compromised. If you relied on them for certain tasks, it’s time to explore other options. Whether hiring help for home repairs or seeking emotional support from friends or family, it’s imperative to establish new sources of assistance. Remember, breaking free from co-dependency is vital for your well-being.
As you navigate this challenging period, remember that support is crucial. Reach out to trusted friends, consider professional guidance, or explore resources tailored for those going through similar experiences. For additional guidance on fertility and insemination, consider visiting CDC’s excellent resource for comprehensive information. If you’re interested in exploring options for home insemination, check out this informative blog post. You can also find a wide range of kits available at Make a Mom.
Summary
Divorce is a tumultuous journey that demands careful navigation. By prioritizing self-protection, limiting direct communication with your ex, and redefining your support network, you can better manage the emotional landscape of your separation. Remember, you are not alone, and support is available to help you through this process.