Judgment can be a slippery slope. We often dislike being judged ourselves while casting opinions on others like it’s second nature. According to Google, this tendency might be ingrained in us, though some may argue otherwise. I must confess, I’ve been guilty of judging others, particularly parents of young children, before I became one myself. My judgments were never rooted in malice but rather stemmed from ignorance. It’s easy to form opinions without having experienced the challenges of parenting. Here’s my heartfelt apology to all the parents, along with a list of my top ten misjudgments.
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Bribery
Before becoming a parent: “I can’t believe they resorted to giving their child a cookie to stay in the shopping cart. The child should just obey and sit quietly.”
Now that I’m a parent: I find myself packing an arsenal of snacks for every shopping trip. To keep my son seated, I’ll offer him treats just to ensure he stays put. Apparently, he doesn’t simply comply because I say so! -
Leashes
Before becoming a parent: “Who in their right mind would put a leash on their child? They’re not pets.”
Now that I’m a parent: I can see how a leash might be a lifesaver. While I haven’t used one yet, I understand the appeal of keeping a wandering toddler close, especially in crowded spaces. -
Screaming
Before becoming a parent: “Why don’t they just stop that child from screaming? It’s embarrassing!”
Now that I’m a parent: When my little one has a meltdown, I often panic and flee the scene, leaving behind my cart. I’m learning to stay calm and address his feelings, but it’s definitely a work in progress. -
Naps
Before becoming a parent: “Can’t you just let your child sleep in the car? Why plan your whole day around nap time?”
Now that I’m a parent: My day revolves around nap schedules. Missing a nap is catastrophic, and I’ve learned that car naps can throw everything off course. Sleep is now my top priority. -
Schedules
Before becoming a parent: “Just go out to lunch with your friends; your child will adjust.”
Now that I’m a parent: I meticulously plan my outings around my son’s schedule. A routine gives him a sense of security, and I’ve learned to respect that. Now I understand why other parents often decline lunch invitations. -
Traveling
Before becoming a parent: “Just hop in the car and go! You only need the car seat.”
Now that I’m a parent: Traveling is no simple feat. We attempted a trip once, and it was a disaster. I got sick, and my son wouldn’t sleep unless he was in my arms. I now realize how much preparation is needed for any journey, even a quick trip to the grocery store. -
Protectiveness
Before becoming a parent: “Can’t kids just play outside? What’s the big deal about leaving them with a babysitter?”
Now that I’m a parent: I can’t let my son out of my sight. The moment I became a parent, my awareness of potential dangers skyrocketed. I’ve become fiercely protective! -
Germs
Before becoming a parent: “Germs are overrated; they help build immunity.”
Now that I’m a parent: Germs are everywhere, and I’m armed with hand sanitizer at all times! I even find myself sanitizing my son’s clothes. It’s a bit obsessive, but I can’t stand it when he gets sick. -
Dirty Faces
Before becoming a parent: “Why can’t you just wipe your child’s face? It’s not that hard.”
Now that I’m a parent: There are simply not enough wipes to keep my son’s face clean. I’ve resorted to the spit-on-finger method, much to my own dismay. -
Restaurant Messes
Before becoming a parent: “I can’t believe those parents let their kids make such a mess while eating!”
Now that I’m a parent: I apologize profusely for the chaos under our table after a meal. Teaching manners and using utensils is harder than I ever imagined.
Reflecting on my pre-parent self, I realize I came off as rather judgmental. It’s true what they say: parenting can humble you. Now, I’m much more empathetic towards others navigating this challenging journey. To all parents, I sincerely apologize for my past judgments. And to those who aren’t parents yet, reserve your judgments for when you’re walking in those shoes.
Ultimately, let’s extend kindness and understanding to one another, as we all have our struggles and challenges. For more insights and support, check out other helpful articles, such as this one, or learn about fertility resources at Make a Mom. Additionally, the CDC provides excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary
Judging others, especially parents, is an all-too-common behavior that often stems from ignorance. The author reflects on their misconceptions about parenting before becoming a parent themselves, sharing ten specific areas where they’ve changed their perspectives. From bribery to the challenges of travel, their experiences illustrate that parenting is a complex journey that requires empathy and understanding from everyone.