Updated: July 2, 2020
Originally Published: March 21, 2018
In many instances, individuals facing mental health challenges may struggle to articulate their feelings. This is particularly true for children and adolescents, who often lack the vocabulary to express their emotional turmoil. Some children may come from abusive backgrounds, sensing something was amiss but unable to explain it. Others may resort to softer phrases that hint at deeper issues, such as suicidal thoughts or self-harm. Many are simply grappling with symptoms of mental illness they don’t fully comprehend, yearning for adult intervention.
Recognizing these coded expressions can be crucial for identifying children who are struggling and connecting them to necessary resources and support. To gain insight into this issue, we reached out to our community, asking members to recall phrases they used in childhood that were essentially cries for help. Here’s what they shared:
- “I Don’t Feel Good.”
“My anxiety often manifested as physical discomfort. Chronic headaches and stomach pains became commonplace, and I eventually accepted this pain as normal. Reflecting on it now, I realize it was my mental health crying out for help.” — Emma R. - “I’m Bored.”
“When I said, ‘I’m bored,’ what I really meant was, ‘I need to escape these overwhelming thoughts.’ I struggled with anxiety, which wasn’t diagnosed until later in life, but the signs were always present.” — Mia T. - “I Have a Stomachache.”strong>
“Frequent stomachaches were a significant indicator of my anxiety as a child. Panic attacks would leave me feeling faint in class, yet adults often misinterpreted my struggles as mere attention-seeking behavior.” — Sarah L. - “Can I Stay Over at Your Place?”
“I would casually ask friends if I could sleep over, using it as a means to escape the chaos at home caused by my parents’ addiction. This became a regular pattern for me.” — Jamie W. - “I Don’t Know.”
“My response to most questions was, ‘I don’t know.’ I was terrified of giving the wrong answer and often felt judged, making it hard for me to ask for help.” — Chloe N. - “I’m Scared.”
“My repeated expressions of fear often went unrecognized. Even I struggled to understand my own terror, which sometimes led to tears. My peers and family didn’t grasp that I could be experiencing a mental illness.” — Olivia P. - “Nobody Loves Me.”strong>
“I often expressed that ‘nobody loves me.’ This feeling stemmed from a lack of care in my life. It took decades of professional support to start healing from my bipolar disorder.” — Jason M. - “I Want to Go Home.”strong>
“I now see that my longing to go home was a child’s way of expressing a desire for safety and comfort. I often felt unsettled even in familiar spaces.” — Lily H. - “I’m Tired.”strong>
“This was code for: ‘I’m exhausted from feeling this way.’” — Emily F. - “I Feel Like I’m in a Dream.”strong>
“This phrase reflects my struggle with depersonalization disorder, anxiety, and depression, a realization that took me nearly 25 years to understand.” — Rachel K. - “I Can’t Think Right Now.”strong>
“The overwhelming pressure of homework and school triggered my anxiety to the point where I felt mentally paralyzed.” — Anna J. - “I’m Sorry.”strong>
“I often apologized excessively, feeling immense guilt over minor issues. This sensitivity has persisted into adulthood.” — Sophie V. - “I Don’t Want to Go to School.”strong>
“I had my first panic attack at just eight years old, a time when I couldn’t comprehend what was happening to me.” — Ben R. - “I Can’t Do It.”strong>
“I would often break down, overwhelmed by my emotions, especially when discussing triggers. The sadness would wash over me suddenly.” — Zoe T. - “My Heart Hurts.”strong>
“At seven, I told my parents my heart hurt, not realizing it was anxiety manifesting as a panic attack, a truth I only came to understand in my teenage years.” — Isaac D.
If you or someone you know is in need of assistance, please consult our resources on suicide prevention. For immediate support, consider reaching out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.
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Summary:
Children often communicate their struggles indirectly through coded phrases that signal a need for help. Understanding these expressions can play a vital role in providing the support they need.