The first time my son, Eli, uttered the word “freakin’” in front of me, it felt entirely out of place. He was only 7 years old and had just lost his temper. It all happened during dinner one evening. My father was entertaining the kids, and I was in the kitchen preparing their meal when my 10-year-old daughter, Mia, mentioned, “Eli got in trouble today at school.” I knew that getting reprimanded was a significant event for him, as I was often on the receiving end of calls from his teacher.
“Freakin’ snitch!” Eli erupted.
My father gasped, and Mia and her older brother, Ryan, burst into laughter. “What did you just say?” I shouted from the kitchen. Eli fell silent, his face reddening, his teeth clenched, and his eyes glistening with tears.
“Go to your room until you’re ready to say you’re sorry,” I instructed. The door slammed behind him, followed by a loud exclamation. “You’re all freakin’ snitches!”
The second incident occurred when Mia rushed in after school and devoured the last cookie. I was in my home office and heard Eli mutter, “You freakin’ snitch.”
“Excuse me?” I called out, following him to his room. “That kind of language isn’t allowed here.”
“Ryan says it. Mia says it.”
I told him I hadn’t heard either of them use such words. Then, he hit me with it: “Mommy, you say it too.”
I was momentarily speechless. He had a point. I often used the word “freakin’” without even realizing it. In moments of frustration, it slipped out effortlessly: “Are you freakin’ kidding me?” or when I dropped something, “Freak!”
Recently, I’ve stopped sending Eli to his room when he lets a curse word slip. Instead, I just raise my eyebrows and shake my head, echoing the expression he often gives me.
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In summary, navigating the complexities of language and discipline in parenting can be challenging. Instead of imposing strict rules about cursing, I’ve chosen to foster understanding and dialogue with my son about language, allowing for a more relaxed approach.