When you find yourself at the park with your child who has special needs, or you’ve finally gathered the strength to load your child’s wheelchair into the car for an outdoor outing, it’s not uncommon to notice someone observing you. Perhaps you even encounter an old acquaintance, which can quickly lead to uncomfortable exchanges. As parents of children with special needs, we face these situations frequently. Here are some common frustrations and guidance to transform those awkward moments into more pleasant interactions.
Frustration #1: Misguided Attempts at Relating
It’s wonderful to reconnect with friends after a long time. Conversations often begin on a positive note:
The Acquaintance: “Hi! Wow, it’s been forever! Your kids are adorable!”
But then, the exchange can take a strange turn:
The Acquaintance: “I just wanted you to know that my neighbor’s cousin’s daughter has autism.”
Special Needs Parent: “Umm… okay?”
Often, we don’t know how to respond to these tangents. It’s better to keep the focus on catching up rather than sharing distant connections.
Frustration #2: Pity in Public Spaces
We understand that our experiences can differ significantly from typical parenting challenges, but please refrain from feeling sorry for us when you see us out in public. If we’ve managed to pack our child’s wheelchair, oxygen equipment, or feeding supplies, celebrate our ability to be out and about rather than reminding us of our struggles.
Frustration #3: The Unwanted Stare
If you notice a family with a child in a wheelchair or a child experiencing a meltdown, it’s easy to find yourself staring without realizing it. We are aware of these glances. If you catch yourself staring, don’t look away suddenly or walk off. Instead, acknowledge our presence with a smile or a friendly nod.
Want to go a step further? If you see a child having a difficult moment, kindly ask the parent if they need assistance. A simple offer can mean a great deal.
These common frustrations stem from personal experiences, though many parents of children with special needs can relate. For more insights on this topic, check out our other blog post on home insemination kits and helpful resources like Johns Hopkins Fertility Center, which provide valuable information on fertility and pregnancy.
In summary, when interacting with friends who have children with special needs, focus on genuine connection rather than assumptions or pity. Acknowledging their challenges in a supportive way can foster more meaningful relationships.