In a rather shocking statement, an elementary school principal from Oregon has proposed that children who are bullied should simply work on being less bothersome. Luke Johnson, the principal of Maple Grove Elementary in Scio, Oregon, claims he has discovered the key to resolving bullying, a persistent issue throughout history. The solution? Kids who are bullied need to adjust their behavior.
According to Johnson, in a video he shared on social media, he argues that the responsibility for bullying does not lie with the aggressors. Instead, he believes that those who experience bullying should change how they interact with their peers. “From my observations, the children who often find themselves being bullied are not the best at forming friendships. They might not recognize it, but they tend to irritate others,” Johnson states during a segment of his online series called Parent Academy, titled “Discussing Bullies.”
He elaborates, “These children may not intentionally annoy others, but they do so regardless, and often seem to relish it. Bullies might rationalize their actions by thinking these kids deserve it or that they are simply teaching them a lesson.”
Essentially, this principal, who is supposed to guide and mentor young students, suggests that the fault lies with the victims and that they should strive to be better friends. This raises the question: why should we address the bullies who actively choose to intimidate their classmates? Instead, Johnson implies it’s about balancing the scales by showing these “annoying” children how to improve.
Moreover, he has advice for parents of bullies, shifting the blame to them as well. “If your child is being targeted, you should also help them understand how they might be alienating themselves from their peers,” he advises. This perspective has led some parents to accuse Johnson of “victim-shaming,” a critique that is indeed warranted. Children who are bullied are not responsible for modifying their behavior; the focus should be on the bullies who intentionally choose to mistreat others.
Imagine telling your child, who has been hurt by bullying, that the solution is simply to become a more agreeable friend—this perspective is alarming. “It sends a harmful message to children that they are at fault for being bullied and that they are unlikable,” remarks Sarah Thompson, a parent from Johnson’s school.
As we contemplate this troubling scenario, we can only hope that Johnson’s own children never face such bullying themselves.
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In summary, the assertion from an elementary principal that bullied children should bear the burden of changing their behavior is not only misguided but harmful. Addressing the root causes of bullying should focus on the perpetrators rather than placing undue responsibility on the victims.