It was an otherwise unremarkable evening. I found myself on the living room floor, distractedly working on a blanket project while the final episodes of a comedy series played in the background. My daughter, 8 years old and full of her unique charm, plopped down on the unfinished blanket as I wove the last few stitches.
“Mom,” she said, her small face illuminated by the flickering light of the TV above the fireplace. Her skin was still soft and youthful, her adorable nose had a tiny smudge of dirt, “Is he gay?” She gestured towards the flamboyant character on screen. Not really paying full attention, I replied, “Yes, sweetie, he is.”
She sprawled out on the not-yet-completed blanket, her arms and legs moving in invisible snow angels. “I think I’m gay, too,” she declared with a calm certainty. I felt a rush of warmth and wanted nothing more than to leap up and embrace her, shower her with love, and affirm her feelings. But I followed her lead; to her, it was just a casual statement, not a monumental revelation. “I think so too, sweetheart,” I responded gently, keeping the moment light.
The entire exchange was a simple 18-word conversation. Yet, I had been aware of her identity long before she spoke it aloud. I’d noticed how she interacted with boys, the way her vibrant personality would freeze when a pretty girl entered the room, and how her gaze lingered on girls just a bit older than her. The characters she doodled in her notebooks, the valentines she crafted for the blonde girl sitting next to her in class—all of these signs were clear. This is who she is, just as much as her bright blue eyes and artistic flair define her. I wouldn’t change a thing.
After tucking her in that night, showering her with extra kisses and tighter hugs, I made my way back to the couch. With a beer in hand, I sat in the serene glow of the fireplace, and then the tears came. But they weren’t tears of sadness; they were tears of realization. Despite knowing this moment was coming and hoping it would be free from turmoil, the weight of the world suddenly pressed upon me.
Thoughts of every hate crime I had ever heard about flooded my mind, and I couldn’t escape the grim statistics. How much more likely my sweet girl might be to face violence, depression, or discrimination. I envisioned how she could be denied opportunities in life simply because of who she is. If you knew her, you’d understand the depth of my concern—she has a heart of gold, a contagious laugh, and a sharp wit. When her teacher transitioned from second to third grade, she chose my daughter for her new class, saying, “She’s just so kind and beloved. She’s the kind of student every teacher dreams of. I’d take 30 of her.” As I lay in bed thinking of her sleeping upstairs in her pug-themed room, her vulnerability felt more pronounced than ever.
When she was just three, I would write my phone number on her arm with a Sharpie at crowded events, terrified of losing her. This blog post is my version of that protective action.
I want to keep my girl safe, and I need your help.
You may not have a child who will face the same challenges mine will, but perhaps one of you reading this will have a child who sits next to her on the subway or walks alongside her on the street. I hope you will raise children who will stand up for her if danger arises. If your child witnesses mine being bullied or mistreated, I urge you to teach them to intervene, to help my sweet girl when she needs it. Because I assure you, she’ll be the first to help yours.
If your beliefs don’t align with being an LGBTQ ally, I implore you to focus on the aspects of your values that promote love and acceptance over judgment. Teach your kids those principles—because soon enough, I’ll be sending my sweet daughter out into a world that can be harsh.
I realize this might come off as selfish, but I need you to nurture a generation that will help protect my child in a world where she could be at risk. I promise to raise my daughter to support yours if she ever sees your child in need. I believe this generation of parents leans more towards allyship than animosity. Please help me prove that right.
For more insights on this topic, consider reading about the journey of parenthood and support at this link. Additionally, for practical resources on home insemination, you can check out this authority, and find excellent support at this resource.
Summary:
In this heartfelt reflection, a mother shares her experience after her 8-year-old daughter comes out as gay. Recognizing the challenges her daughter may face in a world filled with prejudice, she expresses her desire for support from other parents in raising compassionate and accepting children. The mother emphasizes the importance of allyship and community in ensuring her daughter’s safety and happiness.