When my partner received a diagnosis of a rare bone cancer, we aimed to maintain as much normalcy as possible for our children. We chose for me to remain with them at our overseas location while he traveled back to the United States for treatment. This way, our kids could start Pre-K and Nursery school as we had planned, a prospect we had eagerly discussed all summer. They were excited and ready for this new adventure. As their main source of entertainment and interaction, I was also feeling the strain of solo parenting. We explained to our children that Daddy was unwell and would be flying to see a doctor who would help him get better. We marked the day he would return on our family calendar, and I braced myself for the next eight weeks as a solo parent.
I deliberately avoided labeling myself as a single mom, as I know that I have a partner who loves our children just as much as I do and is available for emotional support, even from afar. Although I was alone in a foreign country, I knew there was someone I could count on to share the burdens of parenting with me.
This isn’t just my story, but rather, it’s about t-ball.
Attending “family events” alone with a toddler on my hip and a four-year-old in tow sometimes felt awkward. I struggled to socialize with other parents while keeping a watchful eye on my two kids as they ventured in different directions. Despite the challenge, I was determined to become part of the school community, so I made sure to participate in all the events I could.
On the first day of t-ball, I found myself juggling a diaper bag full of toys for my daughter, snacks, and a sports bag. I was too overwhelmed to notice how others perceived us as we made our way up the hill to the ball fields, with my two-year-old whining about wanting to go to the park and my four-year-old lagging behind. I thought I could handle t-ball registration and the first practice without any issues. My daughter and I would entertain ourselves while cheering for my son. Perhaps I was a bit too optimistic.
As experienced parents might guess, my knowledge of t-ball was limited to blooper videos I’d seen online. I quickly realized that this was a parent-child event where (mostly) dads played a crucial role in guiding the kids through practice. Panic rose in my stomach as I worried that my son might feel the absence of his dad even more acutely, and embarrassment washed over me for not being able to manage both my children simultaneously.
While I was trying to figure out a safe spot for my daughter, a wonderful thing occurred. I glanced up to see a father taking turns playing catch with my son and his own. They were all smiling, and when it was time to line up, he kindly guided both boys into position and assisted them with stretches and drills. I felt an overwhelming urge to hug him and apologize, wishing to explain that we weren’t normally a burden. But then it dawned on me—nobody was treating us like a burden.
No one asked questions or acted resentful about playing catch with my son. One dad after another took the time to help, offering encouragement and tips while sharing their own children with mine. When I ran onto the field to assist my son, I noticed another mom holding my daughter and reassuring me with a gesture that everything was fine.
After practice, I approached one of the dads who had spent significant time helping my son. To my surprise, I discovered we didn’t even speak the same language. Yet, he devoted his time and attention to my child, proving that love and community transcend language barriers. In that moment, I realized that perhaps we could navigate this challenging time together.
This experience reminded me of the importance of community support during tough times, especially in parenting. For more on building connections and resources for families, check out this blog post on home insemination. For couples navigating their fertility journey, Make a Mom provides excellent guidance, and for those interested in pregnancy, Healthline is a fantastic resource.
In summary, my community’s kindness during a challenging time restored my faith in humanity, reminding me that support can come from unexpected places.