Juggling a demanding full-time job? Check.
Single parenting two children? Check.
Raising a child on the autism spectrum? Check.
Managing a spirited but anxious dog? Check.
Relocating during a pandemic? Check.
Mastering remote learning for a high school freshman? Cue the wine bottle…
Before the world was struck by a faceless illness, I was already striving to be a patient and attentive mother to my son, who is on the spectrum and also deals with ADHD. Now, the challenges have multiplied, leaving me questioning my own sanity.
I’m no stranger to high-pressure situations. Currently, I lead marketing for an independent brand engagement agency and have held various senior roles with esteemed brands and organizations. However, no corporate experience has equipped me for the demands of being a Chief Marketing Officer and a single parent during a global crisis.
In this era of virtual meetings—Zooming, Teaming, and various online gatherings—the work-from-home situation presents a mix of positives and negatives for mothers managing their children at home.
Let’s delve into the challenges first.
While I may have some teaching experience as a mother, it hardly qualifies me to assist my 14-year-old, who towers over me at six-foot-four, with his math homework. When he questions the relevance of algebra in his future, I often resist the urge to exclaim, “Never!” Moreover, aside from a few hours of assigned schoolwork, he has plenty of time to immerse himself in video games or TikTok, sending countless messages on Snapchat to people I’ve never met. This brings about a familiar feeling of inadequacy: “I’m failing my child.” If you resonate with this struggle, take a moment to breathe and know that you’re not alone.
Other frustrations? I’ve grown weary of cooking and hunting for flour so my daughter can maintain her sourdough starter. The endless laundry, shopping, and repetitive reminders can feel overwhelming. Yet, in comparison to the struggles many face due to this pandemic, these are minor inconveniences.
Now, let’s focus on the silver linings I’ve discovered amidst the chaos.
Miracle #1: I’m present for my children from dawn until dusk.
Once we navigate the challenging mornings that many parents, especially those with kids on the spectrum, can relate to, we find our rhythm. There are moments when my son, despite his size, will plop down on my lap and request a hug. Though brief, these instances are incredibly heartwarming.
Miracle #2: His grades have improved.
Surprisingly, my constant presence has made a difference. By reviewing his schedule daily and providing real-time encouragement, I’ve helped boost his self-esteem significantly.
Miracle #3: My children are getting along unexpectedly.
With a seven-year age gap and one child studying abroad, sibling rivalry has transformed into camaraderie. Could a pandemic have brought them closer? I’m grateful for this newfound bond.
Miracle #4: A shift in workplace dynamics.
During these times, the hierarchy seems less pronounced, replaced by empathy and solidarity. In the past, my seniority may have created a distance; now, we’re all just people navigating challenges together. This shared experience has fostered deeper connections and compassion among colleagues.
While I wouldn’t wish for another pandemic, it’s vital to acknowledge that this time together is rare and precious. For those of us parenting children on the spectrum, embracing this unique opportunity can lead to unforgettable memories. We’ve laughed more than ever, and that joy is irreplaceable.
To all the parents out there feeling overwhelmed, recognize that you’re doing better than you think. These are not ordinary times, and there’s no handbook for parenting through a pandemic. It’s perfectly okay to have moments of self-doubt, but remember the daily victories: Are your children fed? Do they have clean clothes? Are you managing your work responsibilities? If the answer is yes, then give yourself a well-deserved hug.
Lastly, acknowledge your growth—not just in practical skills, but in patience and gratitude. Humans are resilient; we adapt and move forward. Take some time to reflect on what you’re thankful for, write it down, and revisit those thoughts in the future. They may serve as a grounding force when life presents its next challenge.
This article serves as a reminder that even amidst adversity, the unexpected miracles can shine through, making the journey worthwhile.