I never really took a good look at my vulva until I had specific reasons to do so, like when I was trying to conceive or suspected I had a yeast infection. It’s not something I typically dedicate a lot of time to, especially not in bright light.
Is that too much information? As a lesbian, I’ve seen my fair share of vulvas, and I’ve come to appreciate how unique each one is. I’ve learned to value my own in ways I never anticipated, and I believe everyone should do the same—after all, we only have one, so why not cherish it?
It has taken me time to reach this level of appreciation, to recognize my vulva for what it is and to honor it fully. Now, I understand my vulva better than I did in my twenties, and I cherish it more.
So, let’s have a conversation about our vulvas. It’s time to get acquainted, show them some affection, and stay alert to any potential health concerns we might encounter as proud vulva-owners.
Understanding the Terminology
First things first: let’s clarify some terminology. Many individuals mistakenly refer to their vulva as a “vagina.” However, as writer Sarah Collins explains, “A vulva is the term for the visible part of what most people simply call ‘vagina.’ It includes all the external features of the female anatomy, such as the mons pubis (the fatty area above your pubic bone), the labia (the inner and outer lips surrounding the vaginal opening), the clitoris, and its protective hood, among others.”
Got it? Most importantly, when was the last time you took a look at yours? If it’s been a while, it’s time to change that. Here’s why.
A Personal Health Scare
Recently, I experienced a health scare—not the more common ones like breast or ovarian cancer, but rather a scare related to vulvar cancer. I had no idea that such a thing even existed until I was faced with it. After a painful vulva biopsy, I emerged cancer-free but with a newfound appreciation not only for my body but also for my vulva.
Make it a habit to examine your vulva; it could potentially save your life. When you do, you’ll come to understand that yours is uniquely yours and deserves the same care and respect as the rest of your body.
If I hadn’t taken the time to check in on my vulva, I would never have known to monitor any changes. Our bodies evolve throughout our lives, and our vulvas are no exception. I highly recommend getting a mirror and spending a few moments in natural light inspecting your own vulva.
Inspiration from “In The Goop Lab”
If you’re seeking inspiration, check out In The Goop Lab, hosted by Gwyneth Paltrow. In episode 3, titled “The Pleasure Is Ours,” women discuss having never looked at their own genitalia. With guidance from sex educator Betty Dodson, they are encouraged to build a relationship with their vulvas, which helps them feel more comfortable in their own skin. The episode includes a workshop where women participate in a “genital show and tell,” sitting together naked to view each other’s vulvas, and using mirrors to explore their own.
It’s eye-opening to witness how many women feel disconnected from their own bodies for various reasons. Many compare themselves to the images they see in porn or in educational materials, which is an unfair standard given our bodies’ diversity.
Embracing Vulva Diversity
What I learned from this show is that vulvas come in all shapes and sizes, and every one of them is different. Some are larger, some smaller, some have prominent labia, and others do not. Let’s rebuild vulva confidence by appreciating what we have and taking the time to look at our own anatomy. This understanding will deepen our connection with our bodies.
Writer Jamie Lin notes, “A positive genital self-image correlates with enhanced sexual self-esteem. Feeling attractive in this sense is beneficial for overall self-esteem and intimate relationships.” We still have a long way to go in accurately portraying female, intersex, and trans genitalia while dismantling the narrow and damaging archetypes of vulvas.
Remember, the appearance of your vulva does not define your worth as a person; it is perfect just as it is. It will not resemble anyone else’s. While there may be some similarities between yours and a friend’s, your vulva is uniquely yours—embrace it.
And make sure you’re familiar enough with your vulva to notice any changes. It could make all the difference.
Additional Resources
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Summary
This article emphasizes the importance of self-examination and appreciation of one’s vulva. It highlights the need for women to familiarize themselves with their own bodies, understanding that each vulva is unique and deserving of respect. By fostering a positive self-image regarding genitalia, individuals can enhance their overall sexual health and self-esteem.