The year 2020 revealed the true nature of many individuals. It pushed me—and many others—toward a radical reevaluation of our lives and the people in them. When you’re juggling remote work, home learning, and keeping your loved ones safe during a pandemic, there’s simply no room left for negativity, including toxic relationships.
Crisis often unveils people’s true selves. For many, 2020 clarified that being polite doesn’t equate to being principled. Some of the most outwardly pleasant individuals turned out to be covert supporters of harmful ideologies, prioritizing their convenience over the health and safety of others.
This realization has been profoundly unsettling. Friends I once valued revealed their willingness to sign petitions demanding schools reopen despite the risks. Individuals who claimed to uphold Christian values supported a leader whose actions were deeply troubling. It was shocking to learn that respected acquaintances endorsed harmful narratives and chose to disregard science for their own comfort.
I’ve always held a belief that most people are essentially good, but I’ve learned that “most” is far less than I had previously imagined. I tend to be forgiving, especially in chaotic times, thinking we all deserve a little slack. However, the events of the past year have changed my perspective. There comes a point when you must recognize that some individuals are simply selfish, and I’ve realized I have no patience left for that.
Over the last year, I’ve been actively selecting who I want in my life. The isolation and heightened anxiety have strengthened some friendships while causing others to fade away. I’ve reconnected with old classmates who share similar values, even if we weren’t close in the past. Conversely, I’ve distanced myself from countless individuals.
As we begin to see the end of the pandemic, we face the question of how to handle the relationships that have been strained or broken. Is it possible to ignore the truths we’ve uncovered about others? Personally, I’m not sure I can, nor do I want to. This isn’t just about differing opinions; it’s about fundamental values. I want to cultivate a life aligned with my beliefs, leaving little room for those with contrasting values.
Sure, we might still be cordial during school drop-offs or at the grocery store. We can exchange pleasantries and engage in light conversation. Eventually, emotions may settle, and interactions may become less charged.
However, the reality remains: we cannot unsee what we’ve witnessed. While I believe in the potential for change and redemption, the threshold for trust is considerably higher now. I might hold a flicker of hope for those I once considered good-hearted, but I’m not waiting with bated breath.
2020 was a year that exposed true colors, and those revelations are etched in our memories.
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Summary:
The pandemic has led many to reassess their relationships, revealing true colors that can’t be ignored. As we emerge from this crisis, we must confront the reality of fractured connections and decide how to move forward with those who have shown their values—and whether to maintain those relationships.