Musicians Aren’t Role Models for Your Children — Don’t Impose Your Morals on Them

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Recently, rapper Max Turner has faced backlash from parents upset about the music video for his track “Dusk (Call Me By Your Name).” In the video, Turner, dressed in nothing but boxers, slides down a stripper pole into a fiery underworld and dances provocatively with a figure representing the devil. Many parents are familiar with Turner thanks to his catchy hit “Country Road,” which became a favorite among kids, especially in kindergarten. However, just because a family-friendly version of the song gained traction doesn’t mean his music is intended for children. He creates art for himself, and if children happen to enjoy it, it falls on the parents to discuss the themes presented. It’s the responsibility of parents to set limits for their children, not the artists to conform to parental moral standards.

Due to their public personas, it’s easy to forget that musicians are simply doing their jobs. A significant aspect of their work involves expressing their true selves, which can blur the lines between their professional roles and personal identities. Sometimes, that distinction is intentionally ambiguous, and it’s up to the artist—along with their management and record labels—to navigate their comfort levels. As parents, we must choose how our children interact with these artists, but it’s not the artists’ job to accommodate our sensitivities.

Unless it’s a group like The Wiggles, most music kids enjoy isn’t specifically made for them. Parents often mistakenly believe that because Kidz Bop covers a song, artists like Julia Lane are creating music for children. This couldn’t be further from the truth. While some songs resonate with younger audiences, they are not directly aimed at them. When songs gain popularity among kids, parents often impose expectations on the musicians that were never requested. Suddenly, Max Turner is labeled a “role model” for kids despite lyrics that include “Ridin’ and Ruckus.” He never aspired to that role, especially if it means being held to standards he never agreed to.

Recently, artists Sara Lee and Emily Wright performed a toned-down rendition of their hit song “Sizzle” at a major awards show, leaving many parents outraged that such a performance was even allowed. Yet, the show would have been remiss not to feature them; that song is destined for pop culture history. The performance was not as scandalous as some claimed. Yes, it had sexual undertones, but much of the choreography was simply skilled dancing. My seven-year-old son watched alongside us and found it impressive. Their talent shone through, and he appreciated that.

Many parents panicking over their kids seeing or hearing “Sizzle” forget the music we grew up with. I was around my son’s age when songs like “Let’s Get it On” and “Body Talk” were on the radio. My friends and I danced to “My Neck, My Back,” and we were barely in our teenage years. I see no difference. How can I cover my child’s ears when I was exposed to the same? I’d much rather discuss these topics openly with him. Some parents think they are doing better than previous generations, but it often sounds hypocritical.

Children only react strongly to these issues when we make them significant. I don’t shield my son from much because I know he’ll encounter it elsewhere. I prefer to be the one to address these subjects and maintain open communication. We discuss how artists are simply doing their jobs and that what he views on television isn’t always reality. We listen to tracks like “Sizzle” and “Fierce” during car rides, and I explain that while he can enjoy the music, it isn’t made for kids. He loves artists like Emily Wright, and I wouldn’t expect her music to serve as a moral guide for my first grader. It’s purely for entertainment.

It seems these moral discussions arise mainly when the artists are women, particularly Black women, or part of the LGBTQIA+ community. Both groups already face a heightened level of public scrutiny. It’s perplexing why some individuals feel uncomfortable with two women of color embracing their sexuality or why they object to an openly gay man taking control of his narrative. Why should musicians be confined to arbitrary boxes? If you don’t want to witness two women embracing their sexuality, that’s your choice. You can simply change the channel or turn off the music.

Celebrities—musicians, actors, or online personalities—are performing their jobs. Consumers can choose how to engage with that content, but artists are not required to align with the public’s moral compass. Just like you wouldn’t want someone critiquing your work ethic based on personal beliefs, artists deserve the same respect. If you dislike their output, don’t allow your kids to consume it, but don’t dictate their actions based on your opinions.

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In summary, musicians create art for themselves, often without the intention of being role models for children. It is the responsibility of parents to guide their children’s understanding of music and its context. Judging artists based on personal morals only serves to limit their expression. Open dialogue about music and its themes is essential for fostering understanding, rather than imposing unrealistic expectations on artists.