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On March 25, news outlets around the globe reported on New Zealand’s newly passed legislation that provides women—and their partners—with three days of paid leave following a miscarriage or stillbirth. Initially, I felt a sense of relief and celebration. This legislation represents a significant acknowledgment that pregnancy loss is a real and painful experience that necessitates time for both physical and emotional recovery. As Ginny Anderson, the Member of Parliament who introduced the bill, stated, “The bill will give women and their partners time to come to terms with their loss without having to tap into sick leave. Because their grief is not a sickness, it is a loss. And loss takes time.”
Having endured four pregnancy losses myself, I understand the importance of this acknowledgment. After each loss, I found myself returning to work after exhausting my sick leave, well before I was truly ready. Statistics reveal that approximately one in four pregnancies results in loss. In a workplace like mine, which has hundreds of employees, it’s likely that at least one woman is grappling with this heart-wrenching experience at any moment. Some of these losses can involve serious medical events; I experienced two ectopic pregnancies, one of which required emergency surgery, and I also faced a “missed miscarriage” that involved weeks of bleeding before I was declared no longer pregnant. My most profound loss was the passing of my son, Miles, during the second trimester, which led to another surgery and severe post-traumatic stress.
Even when a pregnancy loss does not entail severe medical complications, the emotional toll is significant. Research indicates that 29% of women who experience a miscarriage or ectopic pregnancy develop post-traumatic stress just one month after their loss. The statistics continue to show that many women face moderate to severe anxiety or depression in the aftermath of such events. Bereaved parents of stillborn children report higher rates of emotional disorders, including long-term guilt, PTSD symptoms, and even suicidal thoughts.
Insufficient Leave
This brings me to my main concern regarding New Zealand’s legislation: three days of leave is simply insufficient. While I recognize the importance of every incremental step toward progress, I cannot help but feel disappointed. Three days is not adequate time to process the devastating news of losing a baby. It’s not enough for recovery after emergency surgery. It doesn’t allow for the healing needed after delivering a deceased infant or planning a memorial service. Three days is hardly enough to make decisions about the nursery or to find a way to cope with such profound grief.
Some might argue that “it’s better than nothing,” much like the six weeks of maternity leave that is often touted. However, we must strive for more than “better than nothing.” We need to stop using “nothing” as the benchmark when it comes to women’s health and well-being.
Comparative Policies
In fact, several countries in Asia have implemented more generous policies. For instance, India offers six weeks of leave following a miscarriage or medical termination. Vietnam provides between 10 and 50 days of partially paid leave, depending on how far along the pregnancy was. In Korea, the leave duration after a miscarriage or stillbirth is determined by the gestational age, includes paid leave, and ensures job security during that time.
The absence of a similar policy in the U.S. raises questions about the claim that we are the greatest country in the world. If legislators are listening, we must do better—better than New Zealand and better for women and their partners facing the profound loss of not just a child, but also the dreams that come with parenthood.
Further Reading
For more on this topic, check out this blog post on home insemination, or explore artificial insemination kits for those considering starting a family. Additionally, the March of Dimes offers excellent resources for pregnancy and home insemination.