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Trigger warning: child loss, suicide
This past Mother’s Day was a poignant reminder of what I’ve lost. As I sifted through the handmade cards from my children over the years, I felt the weight of grief. For many, it’s a time of joy, but for those like me, it serves as a painful reminder of what once was—and what will never be again.
I still cherish two Mother’s Day cards from May 2012. One is from my oldest son, Jake, who was seven at the time, and the other is from my youngest, Dylan, who was six. Dylan’s card, featuring his handprint as a flower and a sweet note about how much he loved me because “she sends me to school,” was given just seven months before he was taken from me in his first-grade classroom at Sandy Hook Elementary School.
Since that tragic day, I have dedicated my life to fighting against gun violence and protecting children, so that fewer parents endure the daily agony I face. We must be more vigilant than ever, as many young people are grappling with mental health issues exacerbated by the pandemic, including increased anxiety and depression.
We may believe that kids are resilient, but the reality is—our children are not okay. As we celebrate Mental Health Awareness Month, we must not overlook the most vulnerable members of our society: our children.
Recent studies reveal that over 70% of teenagers are facing mental health challenges, with one in four contemplating suicide. Alarmingly, suicide is the second leading cause of death among teens, but it is preventable.
The National Crisis Center’s Say Something Anonymous Reporting System has reported a significant rise in students’ concerns regarding suicidal thoughts, self-harm, abuse, and bullying. More than 20% of these reports are now classified as life-threatening situations.
It’s essential to provide students with opportunities to express their feelings and build new social connections as they return to school. Additionally, students, educators, and parents must learn the warning signs of someone at risk of harming themselves or others and understand when to seek help.
In honor of mothers everywhere, I urge everyone—parents, educators, and caring adults—to take action to support our children and secure their futures. We need to implement necessary supports now as we approach the next school year.
While my organization continues to make significant strides in protecting children in schools across the nation, there is still much work ahead. The STANDUP Act, recently reintroduced in the U.S. Senate, aims to provide crucial suicide and violence prevention training in middle and high schools nationwide. Many of these programs are available at no cost to school districts.
Despite the ongoing partisan divide, the STANDUP Act has already passed unanimously in the House and is gaining bipartisan support in the Senate. This is a concrete step we can take today to offer help to those who need it most—our children.
After my precious son Dylan was murdered, I was engulfed in disbelief. As a mother, the thought of never seeing Dylan’s infectious laughter again was incomprehensible. Even after viewing his tiny casket, it felt unreal. Months passed before I stopped instinctively calling him for dinner or checking the rearview mirror to ensure his seatbelt was buckled.
We must take action now to prevent more mothers from experiencing this unimaginable pain. Let’s not allow politics to obstruct our children’s access to the life-saving support they desperately need. We need to put aside political differences—Republicans, Democrats, and Independents alike—to safeguard our children.
The warning signs for the upcoming school year are evident—the kids need our help. When our children return to their classrooms, they require enhanced mental health support. Time is of the essence, and only today’s actions can protect their futures.
Please reach out to your U.S. Senators and advocate for the STANDUP legislation aimed at reducing youth suicide. Collaborate with your schools to ensure more mental health resources are established before students return next year.
Act now to lessen the number of mothers who grieve over cards from children lost to violence or suicide.