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Like many women, I often feel the urge to “play nice.” We’ve been conditioned by societal norms to prioritize others’ comfort over our own. We’re expected to respond with “I’m fine,” “I’m good,” or the ever-popular “blessed,” even when our lives are far from perfect. We might be grappling with challenges like divorce, health issues, caring for a sick loved one, job loss, and more.
As I navigate my second battle with breast cancer, I’ve come to appreciate the freedom that comes with being honest about my struggles. Hiding my pain, especially while undergoing chemotherapy, only adds to my burden. There’s genuine strength in acknowledging our experiences and sharing them openly, without sugarcoating, even when things are tough.
Pretending everything is okay while enduring difficult times is exhausting. By putting on a façade to protect others from my struggles, I only drain my own energy further. Chemotherapy already takes so much from me, and it has taught me to establish boundaries, including rejecting toxic positivity—even when it comes from within.
As a so-called cancer “warrior,” there’s an expectation for me to exude strength and positivity. While I know that people mean well when they tell me I will overcome this battle, such messages can create a storm of internal conflict. I find myself fighting against these expectations daily.
I refuse to maintain a façade. Who am I trying to impress? With my hair mostly gone and dealing with various side effects from treatment, I cannot claim to be “fine.” My world has been turned upside down; I joke with my husband that I resemble a swamp monster. Yet, society expects me to smile and say I’m okay? Absolutely not.
Some days, I can function reasonably well; other days, I’m dizzy, nauseous, and battling severe fatigue. Even stringing together a coherent thought can feel monumental. So, if you ask how I’m doing, be ready for the full, unvarnished answer. You might be surprised; my reality is not that of a cancer hero. I’m determined yet fatigued, and I lack the energy for false positivity. I long for this chapter of my life to end.
Women are often told to keep their struggles private, but I’m breaking that mold. When someone asks me about my well-being, I offer them the raw truth. I’ve stopped doubting myself or worrying about being “too much.” After all, if you ask, you should be prepared for an honest response.
I once believed that sharing my genuine feelings was inappropriate and shameful. Society teaches women to be strong, compassionate, and wise while also knowing their place. We’re expected to be beautiful, gentle, and submissive. If we show too much strength or confidence, we risk being labeled as aggressive or controlling. While these notions are outdated, they still subtly influence us.
Taking ownership of my feelings has been liberating. I refuse to accept the narrative that I should simply accept my circumstances and lie about my feelings. Cancer is a brutal truth in my life right now, and I am not “fine.”
I won’t present a sanitized version of my experience for anyone’s comfort. We are all adults, and we must be able to share our truths without judgment, steering clear of clichés like “God’s will” or suggestions to “look on the bright side.” When I share my struggles, I don’t seek pity, nor do I need fixing. I simply want to be allowed to feel whatever emotions arise—sadness, frustration, hope, or sarcasm. I refuse to hide my battle with cancer as if it were a shameful secret.
Let’s accept one another’s realities and feelings, no matter how difficult they may be. Let’s be the friends who fully embrace someone’s struggles without trying to “fix” them. Sharing our truths not only liberates ourselves but also encourages others to do the same.
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In summary, being honest about our struggles can be freeing and foster connections with others. We need to break free from societal expectations and embrace the truth of our experiences.