Teaching My Kids the Art of Complimenting (Just Like Their Grandma)

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When you spot someone in a pair of shoes that catches your eye, do you take a moment to compliment them? If you admire their haircut, do you share your thoughts? Or if you see someone with an adorable baby in a cart, do you compliment their outfit? My grandmother does this constantly, and it’s one of her most wonderful traits. She has an incredible ability to read people, often sensing when someone is having a tough day and turning it around with a heartfelt compliment. It’s never a generic “I like your shirt” — she genuinely finds something to appreciate about the person. Her talent for brightening someone’s day is truly amazing.

Inspired by her, I’ve made it a goal to encourage my kids to give compliments freely, especially to their peers. When my son received his glasses at seven, it was a significant change for him, and he initially felt a bit self-conscious. Because of this, I’m particularly attuned to kids in glasses; whenever I see them, I tell them how much I like their frames. I adore children with glasses; they remind me of my sweet son and his charming smile. The kids usually respond with a smile and a proud adjustment of their frames, and it warms my heart to uplift them.

Recently, during a medical procedure, I encountered a nurse who seemed distant and unwelcoming. Remembering my grandmother’s approach, I noticed her beautifully painted nails and decided to compliment her on them. The moment I did, the atmosphere shifted; she became more friendly and even complimented my shoes in return. Just four simple words – “I like your nails” – made a difference in our interaction, boosting her confidence and brightening the room.

I won’t pretend that offering compliments is always easy. There’s often a struggle between the urge to be kind and the temptation to walk away. Sometimes, I encounter rude behavior that makes me reluctant to extend kindness. Yet, more often than not, I find myself wishing I had acted differently, pondering if a simple compliment could have changed the situation.

My children spend a lot of time with their grandmother, and they’ve picked up on her positive qualities. They may imitate her sayings or share her taste in snacks, but I want them to master her ability to make others smile through kindness. I remind them, “Do you enjoy when someone says something nice to you? Then you should do the same!”

My kids are surrounded by friends who have their own unique traits to appreciate. Whether it’s a cool new pair of shoes or a fancy bike, I encourage them to express their admiration. I want them to recognize when someone might need a little encouragement and to find something nice to say. Whether it’s congratulating a friend on a soccer goal or celebrating good grades, I believe in the power of kindness. The world can often feel harsh and unkind, and I want my children to shine their light in it.

Offering a compliment is effortless and free; it can be done in a heartbeat. Sometimes it leads to a lovely conversation, while other times, the recipient may simply continue on their way. Regardless, making an effort to spread kindness is what truly matters. It’s essential to remember that while someone may not display an immediate smile, your words could leave a lasting impact on their heart.

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In summary, I strive to foster a culture of kindness in my children, just like my grandmother did with me. By encouraging them to offer genuine compliments, I hope to instill in them the ability to uplift others and spread positivity wherever they go.