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My grandmother had hair as dark as night until her final days. She didn’t resort to boxed dye or sneak my grandpa’s Grecian Formula (he was bald anyway). She was a true exception to the rule.
The Reality Check
The unfortunate truth is that most of us are bound to go grey. While we may already be aware of that, many of us are caught off guard by the numerous changes our hair undergoes as we age—changes that go beyond just color. These transformations can vary depending on genetics and ethnicity, but here are some common changes that many of us (especially women) might experience.
By the time we hit 25, we may start to notice alterations in our hair’s texture. Over the years, our hair can become coarse, curly, thin, straight, or wavy—essentially a free-for-all. Regardless of whether there’s a noticeable change in texture, many will find their hair becomes brittle. You know the saying, “fragile like a bomb”? Well, our hair tends to head towards fragile flower territory—or more accurately, a splintered toothpick.
Most of us are likely to lose both volume and luster, but the hardest pill to swallow is that many women will face pattern hair loss, starting as early as age 12. Yes, hair loss isn’t just a male issue, and it can begin well before middle age.
What’s Causing These Changes?
Various “external factors” contribute to the state of our hair. Some are our own doing: poor diet, over-processing, excessive heat exposure (think styling tools), product buildup, and smoking. Others are harder to avoid, like medication, pollution, and hard water. Then there are the uncontrollable factors, such as illness, pregnancy, and chemotherapy. Finally, we have the inevitable realities of life: stress (physical or emotional), hormonal fluctuations, family history, and, of course, aging.
The Blame Game
What frustrates me is not the natural changes my hair goes through but the fact that no one ever warned us—loudly enough—about these impending transitions. Our mothers provided us with pamphlets detailing the changes our bodies would face during adolescence; they cautioned against the dangers of sunbathing with baby oil and whimsically hinted at future chin hairs and bunions. But when it came to the hair struggles we would encounter, there was nothing.
We were prepared for the grey—we can see it coming. Over time, our once-wavy beach hair may have degraded into limp seaweed, which is disheartening. But the realization that our hair might resemble a poorly styled perm? That was a surprise.
And let’s not forget about the broken strands. Gone are the days of glamorous hairstyles; any attempt at styling would leave us with a sink full of hair debris. A heads-up would have been appreciated, at the very least for the sake of a tiny dustpan.
We often diagnose our lackluster hair as needing special treatments, but the truth is, our hair can simply decide to look sad and dull on its own. Had someone forewarned us, we might have saved ourselves the trouble of blaming our shampoo.
Once, we may have had enough hair for multiple braids; now, a single-strand twist feels like a stretch. No one ever told us we’d look back at our tangled locks with fondness. I genuinely miss those messy days.
We assumed thinning hair was solely a male problem (which seemed fair given all the changes our bodies endure—like hot flashes, bloating, and insomnia—while men merely gain charming crow’s feet). By age 50, around 40% of women will experience hair loss, particularly at the crown.
I recall seeing older women in church with their scalps visible through thinning strands. I hastily blamed Aqua-Net and hood dryers for their situation. If only I had seen their mothers or grandmothers, I wouldn’t have jumped to such conclusions. Was it my fault for making assumptions? Not really. It’s someone else’s for failing to tell me that genetics can be unforgiving.
Final Thoughts on Grey Hair
As women, our bodies continually transform throughout our lives, with some changes being beautiful and others less so. Muscle loss and weak bones are unwelcome, just as wiry, thinning hair is.
Yet, many of us embrace our grey hair. The “50-50-50” rule suggests that 50% of the population has about 50% grey hair by age 50. Perhaps we’re simply tired of the hassle of hiding those less-pigmented strands. It’s clear that there aren’t enough scarves and hats in the world to conceal every grey.
On the flip side, we’re surrounded by confident women rocking their grey hair, like the woman at my pool who embraced her natural grey at just 34. Even younger individuals have joined the trend; the hashtag #GrannyHair gained popularity on social media back in 2015, complete with how-to guides.
Grey hair, once a sign of decline, is now often celebrated. Look at icons like Helen Mirren and Lady Gaga, and you’ll see just how alluring grey hair can be.
While we may never fully accept the thinning, coarse, and dull hair that often comes with age, perhaps we can prepare future generations by warning them: changes are coming, and it’s never too early to look into preventative measures.
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