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During my first night back from the hospital, I managed to sleep for a full eight hours. I know this because it’s documented in my baby book, and my mom often reminisced about what a sound sleeper I was. It wasn’t because I was a perfect angel sent from above; it was simply because I require a lot of sleep.
Just the other evening, while watching a movie with my teenage daughter, I noticed her glancing at me every few minutes to check if I was still awake. She is well aware that I typically fall asleep on the couch between eight and nine in the evening, regardless of what’s occurring around me, as long as I feel relaxed and cozy.
My partner knows better than to schedule any activities after five unless we can enjoy an early dinner together, since I tend to turn into a pumpkin once the sun sets.
I’m one of those individuals who needs a minimum of eight hours of sleep each night, though I often prefer nine or ten. I can manage with seven hours for a single night, but getting six hours or less leaves me feeling like I’ve been hit over the head repeatedly with a log.
When I anticipate that my sleep will be limited due to an early rise, a busy schedule, or insomnia, I begin to panic. I worry about my ability to function the next day, think about when I can sneak in a nap, and dread the inevitable mood swings and fatigue that will follow. The headache usually kicks in at dawn, and I can already picture how tired and worn out I will look.
As soon as the clock strikes 11:00 p.m. and I’m struggling to fall asleep, my anxiety skyrockets. This stressed mindset certainly doesn’t help me drift off.
The situation was particularly bad a few months ago when I found myself wide awake, burdened by thoughts. Despite trying melatonin, lavender scents, and relaxation techniques, I was still awake at 1:30 a.m., in sheer panic mode. That night, I didn’t sleep a wink, and it took me days to recover.
It was then that I realized I was dealing with sleep anxiety: the more anxious I became about falling asleep, the harder it was to actually do so.
Anxiety is the most prevalent mental health issue in the United States, impacting over 40 million Americans. Insomnia, a sleep disorder that makes it difficult to fall asleep for extended periods, affects around three million Americans. Sleep anxiety, however, is a specific type of performance anxiety, according to Dr. Alexander Obolsky in an article for WebMD. In essence, you become so worried about not getting enough rest that your mind refuses to shut down and let you fall asleep.
Another cause of sleep anxiety for some individuals could be recurrent nightmares. Naturally, you wouldn’t want to fall asleep if you anticipate having frightening or distressing dreams.
What Can You Do If You Experience Sleep Anxiety?
According to Teen Vogue, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)—a type of therapy that focuses on addressing disruptive, anxious thoughts through behavioral changes and a new way of thinking—can effectively reduce sleep anxiety.
It’s also important to avoid overthinking your sleep and to accept that it’s okay to get by on less sleep, especially if you’re otherwise healthy. This is a trap I often fall into; lying awake worrying has never made me feel tired—it actually has the opposite effect—until the following day, that is.
If you start feeling anxious about getting enough sleep, plan something enjoyable for the next day. This way, as suggested by Teen Vogue, you won’t associate dread with the day that follows a poor night’s sleep. It doesn’t need to be extravagant; something as simple as treating yourself to your favorite ice cream or purchasing that pair of earrings you’ve had your eye on can create a positive expectation.
One of the best pieces of advice I received from my doctor was to get out of bed if I can’t sleep. She suggested walking around the kitchen, reading on the sofa, or engaging in any relaxing activity rather than lying in bed counting the minutes of lost sleep.
For me, this approach has proven effective. I’ve learned that if I don’t get all the sleep I think I need, the world doesn’t collapse the next day.
While insufficient sleep can certainly take a toll, lying awake worrying about it won’t help at all—believe me, I’ve been there. If you’re facing similar struggles, consider trying these tips; they might just help you as they have helped me. We could all use one less thing to feel anxious about, right?
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Summary:
Sleep anxiety is a common issue that can prevent individuals from falling asleep due to excessive worry about not getting enough rest. This anxiety can create a cycle where the fear of sleeplessness exacerbates the problem. Effective coping strategies include Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, planning enjoyable activities for the following day, and getting out of bed when unable to sleep. Recognizing sleep anxiety and finding ways to manage it can lead to better sleep quality and overall well-being.