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In my elementary and middle school years, I was surrounded by the same group of about twenty classmates. You might assume that spending nearly a decade together would foster close friendships, but that wasn’t the case at all. Sure, they were nice enough, but I never really connected with them the way those ‘90s and early 2000s movies portrayed friendships. I attended all the sleepovers and birthday celebrations, yet when high school came knocking, I left those relationships behind. What was the issue? Was it me? Or perhaps I just needed a larger pool of people to find genuine connections.
Spoiler: that didn’t change anything either.
I was part of the cheerleading squad for four years, and do I keep in touch with those girls today? Not at all. Honestly, I wish I could erase a lot of those years from my mind. My biggest struggle with forming real friendships during my teen years stemmed from my boyfriend at the time. He consumed my world (as 17-year-olds often think they can’t live without their moody partners). This infatuation led me to fit into his social circle instead of nurturing my own. Naturally, when that relationship ended, so did that group of friends. (But, honestly, it was for the best.)
Friendship Is a Two-Way Street
During those turbulent early years, I had just one true friend—my sister. Although she didn’t have much choice in the matter, our bond wasn’t always smooth sailing. We often laugh about our rocky relationship now, but growing up four years and four days apart meant we faced many different milestones at different times, resulting in our fair share of chaos. Yet, we’ve emerged stronger together.
My sister is my best friend not just because she’s my family; she supports me without judgment and loves me unconditionally—even when she probably wanted to shake some sense into me. I do the same for her. Friendships built on honesty, trust, and mutual respect are the ones that endure.
Even when the truth is hard to hear, we can always rely on each other to do right by one another. That’s what’s kept our friendship thriving for so long. I’m a giver and a people pleaser, which is often great, except I’ve learned some people will take advantage of that. I’ve had friends who would ditch plans with me at the last minute for a guy who only wanted them when it was convenient for him. I’ve been on the receiving end of disappointment too, but I’ve made an effort not to repeat those mistakes.
My Circle Is Small but Strong
Perhaps I became more cautious after repeatedly receiving late-night calls about relationship woes that didn’t seem as dire as they were made out to be. Regardless, I was relieved to exit those messy situations. Yet, it made me question if the issue lay with me.
Because of these experiences, I’ve always been cautious about making friends. I engage in light conversation but avoid getting too close. Over the past five years, aside from my sister, only two other amazing friends have managed to break through my defenses.
One I met back in 2016. We chat, vent, and celebrate together. Even if we only see each other every month, our get-togethers never feel forced—we pick up right where we left off. The other friend has been in my life for about three years. We share a workspace, allowing us to engage almost daily. Even when she left me alone in the office during her maternity leave (how dare she! lol), we’ve always been there for one another.
That’s the essence of friendships that matter; there’s a balance of give and take. Like any relationship, it only flourishes if both parties are invested. So, if you aren’t the best at making friends, don’t fret. It simply means you haven’t discovered your tribe yet. Once you do, cherish and appreciate them, and they’ll reciprocate.
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