Why I Allowed My Kids to Play with Fire During Our Family Getaway

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As the sun set on our island vacation, I watched my eldest daughter, who usually hesitates to even touch a toaster oven at home, confidently grasp two chains with flaming balls swinging from them. A playful cat meandered in the background while a soft breeze danced around her colorful tropical dress as she spun the fiery orbs.

It was surprising to see that her anxiety over a small kitchen appliance paled in comparison to her excitement about handling real flames. Her beaming smile spoke volumes about her trust in the moment, bolstered by the guidance of a man named Leo, whom she had just met half an hour earlier.

Leo, a local Kauai resident, generously opens his home to share Polynesian culture and arts, offering an exhilarating opportunity for visitors to engage with fire dancing and gain a fresh outlook on life. And I assure you, that’s not an exaggeration.

Leo’s classes, which encompass drumming, flute playing, and fire dancing, involve hands-on learning and captivating storytelling that captivate participants, forging connections that are truly remarkable. He connects with everyone, from my 72-year-old father to my boyfriend and our school-aged children — each experience uniquely personal despite sharing the same space.

This wasn’t just another vacation rental experience; it was a transformative moment. While Kauai offers many adventures like kayaking at sunrise, snorkeling alongside dolphins, and ziplining through lush canopies, none of these excursions provide the deep cultural immersion that Leo offers. They don’t leave you with an intellectual souvenir that lingers in your mind and encourages you to view life through a new lens.

As we navigated the winding roads toward Leo’s home, I felt a mix of anticipation and uncertainty, reading directions that included quirky landmarks like “over the big hill” and “the tall driveway on the left.” This seemed representative of the free-spirited approach of the man we were about to meet.

We knew little about what lay ahead as our rental car climbed his driveway. We learned that Leo had spent two years living in the jungle by choice, was a performer at local luaus, and taught visitors to find and craft authentic flutes from materials sourced directly from the jungle.

Upon arrival, a tent set up in his driveway hinted at the fun waiting for us. When Leo appeared, casually dressed with one arm through a yellow T-shirt, I wondered if we had caught him at an inconvenient time. But within moments, he had our daughter chanting as she struck a drum, creating a rhythm that resonated with our family and another group present.

Leo shared stories of his childhood and expressed his deep love and respect for the island while emphasizing the importance of community, which we experienced firsthand as we joined in creating music together. His passion was infectious; he wasn’t merely performing for tourists; he was inviting us into his world.

This intimate setting allowed us to gain a true understanding and appreciation of his culture. After our drumming session, we moved outside to the fire-spinning area. Leo, who had just educated us about the island’s rich natural resources and the impacts of commercialization, handed us flaming chains and sticks that shifted our focus to our primal fear of fire.

The whole experience boiled down to understanding and controlling fear. When Leo handed me the flaming chain, it became a dance between me, the fire, and the fear that accompanied it. In that moment, I felt like a part of something bigger, surrounded by a supportive community that cheered for every successful spin.

As our children eagerly awaited their chance to dance with fire, I felt an overwhelming sense of pride. For those two hours, we were the coolest parents in their eyes, and it was exhilarating.

After leaving Leo’s driveway, the adrenaline began to fade, allowing us to reflect on what we had just experienced. It was more than just an exciting activity; it was an opportunity to embrace fear, take control of danger, and apply those lessons to life moving forward.

This kind of transformative experience is not something you can buy; it requires openness and willingness to engage fully. You won’t find it in a souvenir shop or on a typical tourist itinerary — it’s something to experience at Leo’s home, just beyond the hill, at the tall driveway on the left.

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Summary:

During a family vacation in Kauai, we experienced an unforgettable fire-dancing lesson from a local named Leo. My children, who usually shy away from unfamiliar challenges, embraced the opportunity to dance with fire, learning to understand and control their fear in a supportive community. This experience transcended typical tourist activities, offering us valuable life lessons about bravery and connection to culture.

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