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In just five months, I’ll be celebrating my 40th birthday. That’s right—the big 4-0! Rather than dwelling on regrets or stressing about getting in shape—things society typically expects of me—I’m filled with excitement. For me, turning 40 is a significant milestone, one to be celebrated, not feared. Age is more than just a number; it’s a marker of achievements and experiences.
My eagerness to reach this milestone stems from the challenges I’ve faced over the last fifteen years. I’ve navigated through a medical rollercoaster that began with a near-fatal incident, which thankfully led to a diagnosis rather than a tragic end. Twelve years after being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, I discovered a lump in my breast. While initial scans were encouraging, a subsequent biopsy revealed early-stage breast cancer. After undergoing a mastectomy and extensive therapy, I was beginning to reclaim my confidence when a small knot in my chest wall turned out to be a recurrence of the cancer.
Now, having completed twelve rounds of chemotherapy and immunotherapy, I’m currently in the midst of radiation therapy. This past year has certainly been a whirlwind, but I am incredibly grateful to be alive and healing. My journey has shown me that turning 40 is a privilege—not everyone gets to celebrate this birthday.
As I age, I find that I am gaining immense confidence. I know what I want, and whether it’s right or wrong, I’m ready to pursue it. Decisions come easier as I trust my instincts. I wear what I feel comfortable in, regardless of trends, and my wardrobe is filled with shades of grey. The opinions of others don’t dictate my choices.
I’ve opted out of weighing myself, focusing instead on how I feel. I don’t scrutinize my reflection for every flaw; instead, I choose to appreciate my body—scars, stretch marks, and all. I have the power to shape my narrative, and I choose to speak kindness to myself.
As I approach this milestone, I’ve realized I no longer seek validation from others. Turning 40 has made me recognize that I have one life to live, and it’s mine to shape. If someone disapproves of my choices, that’s their concern, not mine. It feels liberating to dismiss criticism and stay true to myself.
I’m also steadfast in my values and passions, particularly when it comes to advocating for women’s health. I dedicate my energy to encourage women to speak up in medical settings, reminding them of the importance of self-breast exams and regular mammograms. If I were to worry about others’ opinions, I wouldn’t be so open about breast health. Luckily, I don’t seek approval from anyone.
Furthermore, I’ve become more discerning about the energy I allow in my life. I stand firm against prejudice in all its forms, knowing that my children are always watching and learning from my actions. I want them to grow up to be compassionate but strong individuals who aren’t afraid to challenge what’s wrong.
In terms of friendships, I’ve learned to appreciate loyalty while also recognizing when to let go of relationships that no longer serve me. Ending a friendship doesn’t have to be a grand affair; sometimes, moving forward quietly is perfectly acceptable. I now know what I want from a friendship and what I can give, and if a relationship becomes draining, it’s time to say goodbye.
My marriage feels stable and secure, and I love the predictability that comes with it. We communicate openly, embracing each other’s quirks, which brings peace to our relationship.
Lately, I’ve been delving into nonfiction books, discovering more about myself along the way. Have you explored your enneagram? It’s eye-opening! I’m learning to embrace my straightforward nature while also working on being more vulnerable and addressing my anxiety. I’m motivated to grow and evolve.
Embracing who I am has made me realize that turning 40 is something to look forward to. If I’ve accomplished so much in the past decade despite challenges, I can’t wait to see what the next ten years hold. Only time will tell.
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In summary, turning 40 is not a dreaded event but rather a celebration of life and growth. My journey has taught me to appreciate every moment and embrace the future with open arms.