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Let’s get straight to it: I’m furious, and cursing is how I cope. You’ve been warned.
To be honest, I’m struggling with all this pent-up frustration. With Covid deniers opting for animal medication over a safe vaccine, anti-maskers protesting outside schools (yes, schools!), the wildfires in California, and the heartbreaking events in Afghanistan… it makes me want to pack up, buy a small house in the woods, and disappear from it all.
The recent laws emerging in Texas feel straight out of a dystopian novel, and the Supreme Court’s inaction is infuriating. My initial reaction? I’m fed up with everyone.
I don’t want to feel like this. I used to be the optimist, seeing the good in people. I once believed that, at their core, most people were decent. But that faith is wavering now.
Over the past year, I decided to reassess the people in my life, inspired by the KonMari method. Since 2016, I’ve been shocked to see acquaintances and casual friends reveal their true colors. People I once thought were reasonable turned out to be anti-maskers complaining on social media about lockdowns. Others, who seemed kind, have made overtly racist comments while insisting they aren’t prejudiced. The “nice people” I knew revealed themselves as Trump supporters. It’s been a harsh awakening, and I’m not exaggerating when I say it’s shaken my belief in humanity.
Just when I thought I couldn’t be more disheartened than I was during last year’s pandemic, here we are again. If I wanted to declutter my life back then, now I feel ready to go scorched earth.
The anti-maskers are still around, but they’ve only become louder. Instead of typing in all caps on Facebook, they’re now shouting at school board meetings. Those who once supported Trump have transitioned into anti-vaxxers, ignoring a mountain of evidence about vaccine safety and efficacy. A few months ago, we were nearing the end of the pandemic, and now it feels like we’ve hit a reset button.
Those of us who complied, who stayed home, wore masks, and got vaccinated are beyond frustrated. We’re tired of facing the consequences for the actions of the uninformed. We’re exhausted from arguing with individuals who barely passed high school science yet now act like experts in health and biopharmaceuticals. We’re fed up with trying to convince others to care.
I’m an empathetic person, but honestly, my capacity for empathy has worn thin. I’m grasping for compassion, but often all I can muster is pity.
As I mentioned, I don’t want to feel this way. I want to believe in the goodness of people and that they genuinely care about one another.
However, when people reveal their true selves, it also helps me identify those who genuinely “bring joy.” Over the years, casual friendships have deepened over shared concerns. I’ve been encouraged by friends who use social media to combat misinformation and promote the importance of vaccines. I’ve connected with others on a meaningful level simply by admitting, “I’m struggling,” and hearing back, “Me too.”
It’s time to elevate my approach to life. I’m talking scorched earth—tear it all down to rebuild.
It’s not just people who disappoint; our entire system feels broken. Climate change is wreaking havoc, our education system is buckling under the weight of racism and capitalism, and the healthcare system seems to be ignored by those meant to protect us. We can’t rely on “justice” to rescue us from tyranny. So yeah, my default reaction has become a frustrated “screw everyone and everything.” Scorched earth.
I don’t want to stay in this negative headspace. I don’t want to feel constantly let down by everyone, including myself. And though I occasionally fantasize about retreating to a remote cabin, I don’t genuinely wish to cut everyone off. It’s not about hating everyone; I don’t.
What I really want is to surround myself with people who inspire and uplift me, those who care about humanity. I want to create systems and a way of life that serve the many, not just a privileged few. I want to be around those who motivate me to be better while understanding that differing opinions can coexist if we share core values.
Everything else is just a drain on my energy, time, and spirit, and during these chaotic times, I need all the emotional strength I can muster.
Fortunately, when you eliminate the energy-drainers, it becomes clear that the “joy-bringers” outnumber the rest. The past few years have been a gut punch, but I refuse to believe humanity is irredeemable. I still believe in the goodness that exists; we just have to uncover it, and sometimes that means burning down a few things to start fresh.
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In summary, while the current state of the world can be disheartening, it’s essential to focus on the positive connections we have. By surrounding ourselves with supportive and caring individuals, we can foster an environment that uplifts us and brings joy. Scorched earth may be necessary, but rebuilding is always an option.