artificial insemination kit for humans
Dear Home Insemination Kit,
I have a four-year-old daughter and a two-year-old son. Lately, my son has been gravitating towards his sister’s toys, playing with her baby dolls, trying on her princess dresses, and pretending to cook with her play kitchen. This has upset my husband, who believes that our son shouldn’t be playing with “girl toys.” How can I help him see how unreasonable he’s being?
To share a bit of my own experience: I have four boys aged 9 to 16, and they’ve all gone through phases of being fascinated by things typically seen as feminine (without having a sister around). I’ve painted their nails, replaced their worn-out kitchen set, and watched them become mesmerized by ballet performances. One of my boys even wore a pair of sparkly purple “My Little Pony” Crocs for six months straight.
Despite all this, they’ve grown into well-adjusted young men who can tackle both sports and cooking with equal enthusiasm. I feel sorry for your husband — not just for your son, but for him too. It seems he’s stuck in outdated notions about masculinity, likely stemming from his own upbringing, which is a shame.
At two years old, your son isn’t even aware of gender identity yet. According to the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, children typically start to grasp their gender identity between ages 3 to 5. To him, there are no “girl toys” or “boy toys”; they’re just toys he sees his sister playing with. Plus, they’re colorful and fun, designed to attract children. Expecting him to ignore these appealing options is unrealistic.
Your son will grow up to take on adult responsibilities like parenting and household care. Playing with these toys can help him develop valuable skills for the future. Research from Megan K. Maas, a Human Development and Family Studies Professor, indicates that boys who adhere to traditional masculine norms may be more likely to engage in harmful behaviors in relationships.
Above all, it’s crucial that your son feels accepted and supported by his dad, no matter his interests. It’s important for his father to love him for who he is instead of trying to impose restrictive definitions of masculinity.
Telling your husband he’s being unreasonable won’t yield the results you want. Instead, the next time he reacts negatively to your son playing with a doll, calmly explain your perspective. Mention that if your daughter were playing with “boy toys,” he wouldn’t react negatively. Emphasize your son’s happiness while playing with his toys, regardless of how they’re marketed. Highlight the importance of allowing him to explore a variety of interests.
As for my son, he eventually swapped his sparkly Crocs for a pair of basketball shoes that have seen better days, but I have no regrets about supporting both of his interests. You won’t either!
If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination options, check out this related blog post here. For additional insights on fertility, visit Make a Mom’s guide. Also, you can find a fantastic resource about what to expect during your first IUI here.
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In summary, it’s essential for parents to encourage their children to explore a wide range of interests, regardless of traditional gender norms. Supporting your son in his play can foster his creativity and emotional well-being, setting the stage for a well-rounded adulthood.