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If you’ve ever felt uneasy about the amount of time your child spends in front of screens, you’re certainly not alone. Screen time often dominates daily parenting discussions. “Mom, can I watch YouTube? Can I play Roblox? I want to check out TikTok!” It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, especially with so-called “parenting experts” critiquing our choices, suggesting that screen time is harmful to our children’s brains.
The pandemic shifted perspectives on screen time, making many families more flexible with their rules. After all, those devices can be lifesavers for parents trying to juggle work and home life. Even the so-called “experts” are coming to terms with the reality of screen time: it’s not causing lasting damage, and strict regulations aren’t feasible in today’s world.
In a piece for Mother Jones, psychologist Dr. Emma Green highlights that the anxiety surrounding screen time is often based on weak scientific evidence. She notes that many studies on the negative mental health effects of screen use rely on unreliable self-reported data. Additionally, brain imaging studies are often inconclusive due to the complexities of cognitive processes.
This isn’t the first time adults have fretted over new technology. Dr. Green points out that ancient Greek philosophers believed writing would make youth rebellious, while 18th-century parents feared their children would become addicted to reading. Even a 1940s parenting magazine warned that the radio could ensnare children right in their living rooms.
Child development expert Dr. Sarah Matthews, a mom and co-founder of a children’s media company, remarked in the New York Times, “Research into child development can’t keep pace with technological advancements, leading to fear-based decision-making. Many people think that if we can’t be sure it’s safe, we should avoid it.” She emphasizes that while it’s important to limit screen time, technology itself isn’t inherently harmful. “There’s a lot of variety, and not all screen time is created equal.”
Some experts argue that adopting an anti-screen approach is a privileged viewpoint. For countless parents, screen time offers a safe way to keep kids engaged while they manage work and other responsibilities—a reality that was underscored during the pandemic.
Parenting expert Anya Johnson even apologized for her previous stance, acknowledging that her views may have shamed those struggling to find a balance with screens. She recognized that her earlier opinions stemmed from a place of privilege.
Child psychologist Dr. Liam Jones, who leads the Digital Wellness Lab at Boston Children’s Hospital, stated, “Screens aren’t toxic by nature; they’re neutral. What matters is how we use them.” Dr. Matthews also encourages parents to reflect on how specific devices or features enhance or detract from their family experiences.
Kamenetz explains, “I’ve realized that many of our concerns about technology come not from the screens themselves but from the disconnect that can arise in our relationships.” Dr. Green suggests that a better approach is to foster connection: “Instead of arguing about screen time, why not snuggle up next to your child and ask for a hug?”
Of course, this doesn’t mean you should hand over devices without supervision. Ignoring what your children do online can lead them to discover inappropriate content. But there’s no need to feel guilty for turning to screens when you need to tackle that endless to-do list.
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In summary, while screen time management remains a concern for many parents, experts are encouraging a more nuanced understanding. It’s essential to find a balance that works for your family, recognizing that not all screen time is detrimental and that connection is key.