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For as long as I can remember—definitely since my teenage years, if not earlier—I’ve been telling myself that “someday” I’ll learn to play the violin. I envisioned a life where, after my children grew up, once work was less demanding, and when I had a bit of extra cash and free time, I would finally get a violin and start learning.
I tucked that idea away and waited for that elusive someday.
In the meantime, life unfolded. I graduated high school, attended college, and completed law school. I got married, worked hard in my career, then juggled the challenges of parenthood while still trying to thrive in both areas.
That someday kept slipping further away.
As the years went by, I moved to different houses, took on various jobs, and navigated the ups and downs of raising children through all their stages—from toddlers to teens. Someday was still just a distant thought.
I kept justifying the delay, telling myself it was a frivolous dream. After all, I didn’t have time for such a hobby.
Then, a few weeks ago, while visiting family, I asked my niece to show me a few notes on her violin. As she played, all those “someday” dreams came rushing back. Perhaps I could add it to my Christmas wish list as a way to justify the time and expense.
The subject came up again during a therapy session. I expressed my desire to learn the violin but felt it was too silly, too selfish. My therapist encouraged me to go for it.
Later that day, I shared this conversation with my husband. I had done a bit of research and found a local violin store that offered rentals for the cost of a couple of lattes each week. “DO IT,” he urged. “Go get it now.”
I launched into a list of reasons why I shouldn’t—there wasn’t enough time, it felt self-indulgent, I had too much on my plate. But he insisted, “You should get it. NOW.”
“I don’t feel like I deserve this,” I said, rationalizing my hesitation.
“You absolutely should get it,” he persisted. “NOW.”
He grabbed my keys, ushered me out the door, and led me to the car.
“Am I really doing this?” I asked, feeling a mix of excitement and disbelief.
“Yes. And good for you,” he replied.
Forty minutes later, I returned home with a rented violin—an instrument I had no idea how to play and little time to learn. But in that moment, I decided that today was my day.
There were countless reasons to back out—time constraints, feelings of indulgence, the expense of lessons—but I’m grateful for my therapist’s encouragement and my husband’s gentle push. Because today is the day.
As parents—especially mothers—we often set our own desires aside. “Someday” becomes our anthem. Someday we’ll write a book, return to school, or take a cooking class. But why not make today that day?
I’ve come to realize that time will never be perfect. We can always find excuses to dismiss our passions as nonessential. Our kids will always need us, and while that’s wonderful, we also need to prioritize ourselves. Life is short, and tomorrow is never guaranteed.
So whatever it is that you’ve been longing to pursue, take that leap. It might not unfold how you imagined, it might take longer than expected, but those dreams matter. You matter.
I’ve had my violin for a week now, and just seeing its case on the table brings me joy. I may not know how to play well yet, but I’ve learned a few more notes than I did last week, and even though I haven’t magically found extra time to practice, I love it. I’m proud of myself for stepping outside my comfort zone. Reflecting on that dream of learning to play, I feel like I’ve truly achieved something.
Today is that day.
If you’re interested in exploring more about topics related to parenting and personal aspirations, check out one of our other blog posts here. And if you’re considering starting a family, you can find useful information at CDC’s pregnancy resource.
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In summary, I rented a violin to reclaim my dreams and prioritize my passions. Today is my day, and I refuse to wait any longer.