Yup, My Mistake
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An outing with his grandfather didn’t unfold as expected. by Jamie Taylor
On each of my children’s first birthdays, my father takes them out for a special lunch at a local deli. He borrows my car seat, loads them into his Jeep Wrangler, and treats them to a sandwich and a milkshake. While I’m not usually one to cling to traditions, this one holds a special place in my heart. My eldest son enjoyed a delightful trip with his Gramps, relishing a cheesy, saucy sandwich before returning home happy and satisfied. So, when my second son — who shares a unique bond with my dad — was about to turn one, the anticipation for our birthday lunch was high. But this time, things took an unexpected turn.
My son stood by the window, dressed in a brand-new outfit I had just put on him. He was off to the trendy lunch spot, so I wanted him to look sharp. He wore gray checkered shorts, a white tee, and, thanks to his newfound walking skills, his first pair of electric blue sneakers — perfect for Instagram fame.
My dad arrived a bit early, greeted by a slightly anxious but excited birthday boy. I secured the car seat and strapped him in, and off they went. I wish I could say I was calm about sending my one-year-old on this adventure, but I was anything but. Despite being my second child, my anxiety levels were through the roof. However, this outing was important, so I took a few deep breaths, reassuring myself they would return home safe, happy, and full.
I eagerly awaited the first text, hoping for a photo of my son excitedly reaching for his sandwich. When the message arrived, I was taken aback. He seemed fine, but something was off; he wasn’t crying, yet he wasn’t smiling either. “How is he? Is he loving it?” I asked. The response was simply, “He’s okay.”
Just okay? My mind raced. A few moments later, I received some photos. His fingers were messy with cheese and sauce, and his shirt was stained with ketchup. While I remembered my first son beaming in this same scenario, my second son appeared indifferent. He was eating, yes, but he wasn’t happy.
I couldn’t help but wonder what kind of mother sends her one-year-old to a deli with his quirky grandfather? My dad probably didn’t know how to handle him. Maybe he was scaring him or making him anxious. Ugh, I should have trusted my instincts — he’s only “okay” when he’s with me. No one else knows how to care for him like I do.
“Great pictures! Come home soon!” I replied hurriedly.
After a half-finished milkshake and a long drive, they finally returned. My son was in tears, and my father appeared frazzled. “I think he hates me. He cried the entire time!”
Oh no. Now I felt bad for my dad! This was meant to be a cherished outing, and instead, my son was a wreck. I scooped him up and comforted him as he buried his face in my shoulder.
“I don’t understand why he was so upset. Nothing went wrong!” my dad insisted, sensing my frustration. “Oh, it’s okay. He probably just missed me. He’s used to being with me all the time. We have a strong connection. It’s not your fault. Just stay for a moment; he’ll calm down.”
We settled on the couch, my son on my lap, and within minutes, his crying began to subside. “Maybe he doesn’t like being so messy,” I suggested, noticing he was covered in three types of lunch sauce. As my husband dashed to get him a fresh outfit, I removed his shoes.
Instantly, he seemed more at ease. He looked at me wide-eyed and stopped crying. Then, as I glanced at the brand-new electric blue sneakers, I discovered the problem — a bunch of crumpled packing paper stuffed inside! I gasped.
It wasn’t my dad, the strangers, or the deli that upset my precious birthday boy; it was me — his mother, who had shoved his tiny feet into shoes still filled with packing paper, leaving him uncomfortable for over an hour.
Fortunately, no lasting foot damage was done, but what an eye-opener! I was left in tears, my father was annoyed, and my husband has since turned this incident into a running joke at gatherings.
So, the next time you feel like a terrible parent — like a complete mess who can’t seem to get it right — just remember you didn’t send your one-year-old down the highway for a beef sandwich with sneakers packed full of paper. Or maybe you did, in which case, we’re in this together.
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In summary, every parent has their off days, and it’s important to remember that mistakes are part of the journey. Whether it’s forgetting to check shoes or misjudging a situation, the love you provide is what truly matters.