A Shift in Terminology: Why I Prefer ‘Mom’ Over ‘Mommy’

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The term “Mommy” often elicits an involuntary response in me, akin to the discomfort caused by nails on a chalkboard or the irritating scrape of a fork on a plate. It’s a sensation that is, quite frankly, unsettling. The term feels overly sweet, almost nauseating, and I often find myself relieved that I transitioned directly from “Mama” to “Mom,” bypassing “Mommy” altogether.

The root of my aversion remains a mystery. While I frequently hear other parents use “Mommy” without issue, the moment it escapes the lips of my own children, I feel an involuntary shiver. The word is inextricably linked in my mind with whining; both evoke a similar reaction: If this persists, I might lose control.

My children are well aware of this. They often resort to using “Mommy” when they’re being cheeky, seeking something, or competing for the title of the Most Annoying Child of the Year. Picture this in an exaggerated, grating voice: “Sorry about that, Mommy, when you have to fart, you have to fart!” or “Mommy, let’s have M&Ms for breakfast.” This tactic may not yield the results they desire, but it certainly makes my jaw tense.

The very word “Mommy” feels excessively sentimental, almost patronizing, and carries cultural connotations that I find hard to shake off. For instance, the image of Joan Crawford from Mommie Dearest looms large in my mind, a reminder of the darker side of parental dynamics.

In popular culture, “Mommy” is often trivialized, associated with novelty items and condescending greetings. It embodies a certain frivolity and perceived weakness that makes it easily dismissed. While a “Mommy” might offer hugs and affirmations, a mother is expected to set boundaries and instill discipline.

I embrace a multifaceted approach to motherhood—cuddles and laughter are certainly part of my repertoire, but I lean more toward practicality and straightforwardness. If you’re contemplating having M&Ms for breakfast—an idea that is never entirely off the table—I have one simple request: Please refrain from calling me “Mommy.”

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Summary

In summary, my aversion to the term “Mommy” stems from cultural associations, personal experiences, and a desire for a more grounded approach to motherhood. The term feels too sentimental and diminutive for my parenting style. I prefer to be recognized as “Mom,” a title that reflects my more pragmatic and no-nonsense approach to raising my children.