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The Unfiltered Truth of Children: A Look at Parenting
For the past four years, I have pondered a pressing question: How will my daughter, Lily, ever repay me for the intense forty-two hours of labor I endured? As is often the case with children, the answer arrived unexpectedly while I was at the grocery store checkout. Spotting a magazine featuring a glamorous celebrity, Lily blurted out, “Mommy, she looks just like you!”
In that moment, time seemed to stand still, and I felt the warmth of her innocent admiration wash over me. With her sparkly green eyes shining, she continued, “Oh, you think? She’s very pretty,” I responded modestly, while Lily flashed her enchanting smile, allowing me to float on cloud nine. Despite her peculiar visual perception, she had given me a reprieve; we were even.
Of course, I bear no resemblance to that famous actress. The only similarities are my short, cropped hair and brown eyes. Additionally, I’m not a person of color, but children often make broad generalizations, which can sometimes play to your advantage—or not.
For instance, one evening, I arrived at the dinner table looking less than my best. Lily, perhaps harboring some subconscious resentment for not allowing her to bring her toy purse to dinner, decided to compliment me: “You look very handsome tonight, Mommy.” My partner, Sarah, quickly corrected her, saying in a sing-song voice, “You mean, ‘Mommy is pretty!’” But Lily insisted, “No, she’s handsome,” wearing a cheeky grin.
This honesty is not new for her. I’ve been told, “Mommy, your tummy is not as flat as mine,” and “Look, Mommy, you have a little fuzz on your lip!” Just when I thought I had moved past the insecurities of my younger years, I’m reminded again of my physical flaws. Children possess a remarkable ability to speak the unvarnished truth, which can be both refreshing and excruciating.
Lily, with her flowing auburn hair and flawless skin, often draws compliments from strangers, who declare, “What an angel!” Meanwhile, I’m left to navigate the complexities of my own body, which has been shaped by the experience of motherhood. Despite the changes over the years, I’ve come to appreciate my body more than ever, perhaps because I’m no longer seeking validation from others. With Sarah in my life and a full house of kids, I feel secure in my worth, independent of my appearance.
Yet, if only I could silence Lily’s candid observations. Last summer, she asked me if I “remembered fossils,” which led me to reflect on the transparent view children have of the world. They perceive life without the biases and overthinking that often cloud adult perspectives. We’ve all experienced those instances when, after discussing an important social issue, our child sincerely questions why anyone would harm another being simply for being different. Their clarity is profound.
I take pride in instilling values of acceptance and love in my children. I felt validated when I saw it reflected in Lily’s face this morning; her innocent love seemed to radiate without judgment. But then she innocently remarked, “Mommy, your breath smells like cat poop.”
That’s it—I’m drafting her a bill for Labor and Delivery.
In summary, children have a unique way of bringing the world into focus, reminding us of the simplicity of love and acceptance, even as they deliver sometimes painful truths. For more insights into parenting and self-care, check out our related posts on home insemination and fertility options, like those found at Make a Mom and Drugs.com.