20 Things Easier Than Reasoning With a 4-Year-Old

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Parenting can be a challenging endeavor, especially when it comes to engaging with young children. For example, my 4-year-old typically enjoys a nap while watching Curious George after preschool. However, one day, things took an unexpected turn. He lay down, then came running to me, exclaiming he wanted to watch something else but couldn’t specify what that was. This paradox resulted in a two-hour tantrum that felt akin to the emotional turmoil of a high school breakup. Eventually, he fell asleep on the couch, leaving me to ponder the madness that was our interaction.

It’s clear that attempting to reason with a 4-year-old is often an exercise in futility. They exhibit a unique logic that defies adult understanding. To maintain my sanity, I compiled a list of 20 things that are easier than trying to rationalize with a toddler.

1. Shaving while nine months pregnant.
2. Stealing a golden egg from a dragon.
3. Cooking a gourmet meal with a baby on your hip.
4. Experiencing menopause in Florida heat.
5. Understanding Curling rules.
6. Working for a Sea World PR firm.
7. Ruling the galaxy.
8. Being a high-profile public figure.
9. Shopping at Whole Foods on a budget.
10. Flying through the Bermuda Triangle.
11. Navigating Common Core Math.
12. Teaching in public schools.
13. Living with a quirky genius.
14. Fact-checking for a popular late-night show.
15. Undertaking unusual beauty treatments.
16. Having a conversation with a distracted child.
17. Performing procedures on unique breeds of cats.
18. Shopping without exceeding your budget.
19. Attempting uncomfortable cleaning methods.
20. Accompanying a famous musician.

There have been times when I could successfully argue my way out of situations, such as a speeding ticket or a debate about politics. However, the experience of reasoning with my 4-year-old—who, at times, resembles a drunken version of himself—often feels hopeless. Someday, he may try to negotiate curfews or grades with me, and I will be ready, armed with this list. Payback, after all, is a concept deeply rooted in parenting.

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In summary, navigating the world of parenting, especially with young children, can be akin to embarking on a challenging expedition. While it can be exhausting and frustrating to reason with a toddler, it’s important to maintain a sense of humor and perspective.