As a person who appreciates a good deal, I recall an experience from a few years ago when my partner, Alex, and I stumbled upon a closing pharmacy sale. It was the last day of operations, and everything was marked down by 90 percent or available in bulk bags for just five dollars. Naturally, we opted for the big bag approach.
With ten dollars in hand, we dashed to the drug aisle, only to find it nearly empty. No more Pepto-Bismol, Tylenol, or Band-Aids remained, but there was a massive jug of milk of magnesia. “We don’t even use that,” Alex remarked. “But it’s practically free,” I insisted, urging him to toss it into the bag.
Next, we ventured over to the skincare section. To our dismay, there were no moisturizers or shampoos left, yet we did find an entire shelf stocked with Coppertone sunscreen. “How did people overlook this?” I thought, excitedly adding around twenty bottles to our stash.
As we continued our hunt, we encountered an absurd display of banana slicers. “Who on earth invented these?” I pondered aloud. Alex agreed, stating, “It’s more work to clean that than just using a knife.” We grabbed a dozen as time was running out.
“Attention shoppers, only five minutes left!” blared the store’s announcement, leading to a frantic last-minute dash. Alex headed for foot care products while I raced to the beauty aisle, which yielded only used lipsticks and bizarrely colored eyeshadows. I then moved to the greeting cards, snatching any that came with envelopes, not bothering to read them.
Among my finds were some eye-catching book covers that I believed were treasures. I couldn’t fathom why they were still there, and in my excitement, I may have audibly cackled while collecting 40 packages. (In hindsight, they resembled a chaotic art project gone wrong rather than anything by a famous artist.)
Back in the car, we were both laughing as we sorted through our haul. “Wait, seven replacement blades for corn removers? We don’t even have corns!” I exclaimed. “And this kidney disease home testing kit? Really?” Alex chuckled.
Our bags were filled with items that would likely end up in the trash—light bulbs for appliances we didn’t own, greeting cards with absurd captions, and over $100 worth of sunscreen that we’d never use, even if we lived in a tropical paradise.
Then Alex noticed the book covers and raised an eyebrow. “What do you plan to do with those?” “I thought we could hand them out on Halloween,” I replied. “Kids don’t want book covers; they want candy,” he countered. “We’ll give them candy too, it’s a bonus!” I insisted.
Halloween night arrived, and I eagerly set up for trick-or-treaters. The first group, dressed up in creative costumes, received candy along with my book covers. Not a single child expressed thanks—perhaps reflecting a generational shift in manners.
As another wave of kids arrived, including a Buzz Lightyear and Tinkerbell, I handed out candy and the book covers. Their reactions were less than enthusiastic. “She must be trying to get rid of these,” one child whispered to another.
Jim overheard my defensive response, chuckling as he shut the door. I was baffled; I would have loved those book covers! Most people just hand out the same old treats—pennies and pumpkin pencils.
From that day on, I’ve stuck with classic Halloween candies, ensuring a more favorable response from future trick-or-treaters. However, if Batman ever shows up again, I’ll have a banana slicer ready for him.
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In summary, while hunting for bargains can lead to unexpected finds, it can also result in humorous misadventures. Balancing frugality with practicality in parenting is a continuous journey, and sometimes, it’s the simple joys—like classic candies—that resonate most with children.