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Dear Weary Mom in the Trenches
Dear Weary Mom,
I understand your feelings. You are exhausted—exhausted by the daily routine that feels like a never-ending cycle. You find yourself drained from the constant presence of seat belts, sippy cups, diapers, and the chaos that comes with them. The tantrums, the endless episodes of Caillou, and the food strewn across the floor add to your fatigue, especially as winter approaches with its cumbersome hats, boots, mittens, and gloves. Oh, the gloves.
Your patience is frequently tested, and you find yourself overthinking every word that leaves your mouth. The lack of privacy has become overwhelming, and though your love for your children is immeasurable, it often feels accompanied by guilt. You wouldn’t trade your kids for anything, yet there are days when you dream of simply walking out the door and finding a peaceful place—somewhere you can converse with an adult who relates to you rather than relying on you.
Loneliness is a byproduct of this journey you didn’t foresee. You anticipated the fatigue of motherhood, but the solitude can be even more challenging to navigate. There are moments when you question your ability to carry on, feeling as though you might throw in the towel. Times when you experience guilt for raising your voice, shedding tears, or wishing to escape. Remember, you are not alone in this; you are human.
Motherhood is undeniably tough, but you will persevere. One day, that moment you’ve been dreaming about will arrive unexpectedly. Just yesterday, I had one of those moments. I have been rocking my youngest child, Lily, to sleep since her birth. She enjoys it, and truthfully, I cherish it even more. But yesterday, as I settled into the chair, she surprised me by saying, “I don’t want to rock anymore,” and climbed into her bed. Just like that, it was over.
All those fantasies of uninterrupted showers and tidy homes lost their allure. Suddenly, my thoughts were filled with memories of blankies, footed pajamas, and strollers. Realize that there is an end to this phase, and it may arrive sooner than you expect.
No matter what stage you find yourself in, focus on a cherished moment—whether it’s rocking, breastfeeding, reading a story, or simply snuggling. Be present for those fleeting experiences, as they are finite. It may seem like the challenging moments of motherhood will never end, but they do. Unfortunately, when those tough times pass, some of the enjoyable moments may vanish too.
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In summary, motherhood is a challenging yet rewarding journey filled with moments of joy and fatigue. Embrace the moments you love and acknowledge that both the difficult and delightful phases are temporary.