Is Anyone Else Hearing This Nonsense?

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Every morning, I find myself persuading my children into their car seats as we embark on our journey to preschool and kindergarten. Our car rides are filled with the latest Top 40 hits, and as long as the music has a lively beat and catchy melody, we’re satisfied. I don’t scrutinize the lyrics; my children are so young that they often misinterpret the words and overlook any suggestive undertones. At home, we enjoy a dance party playlist that includes some risqué tracks (Katy Perry’s “Peacock” and Icona Pop’s “I Love It” are among our favorites). In fact, I once created a CD for daycare only to discover later that I had burned the explicit versions instead of the radio-friendly ones—a moment I’m not particularly proud of.

Despite my generally relaxed approach to song lyrics, there’s one particular chart-topping track that gives me pause every time it plays on the radio. The lyrics I’m referring to are from the song “Good For You” by Sofia Martinez:

Gonna wear that dress you like, skin-tight
Do my hair up real, real nice
And syncopate my skin to your heart beating
‘Cause I just wanna look good for you, good for you
I just wanna look good for you, good for you
Let me show you how proud I am to be yours
Leave this dress a mess on the floor
And still look good for you, good for you

While I can overlook songs that discuss partying or promiscuity, this one troubles me. Other songs may not promote the best values, but they often depict the artist as confident and self-assured. However, when I consider the perspective of the singer in “Good For You,” the message becomes more concerning:

• The effort I’m making is solely for someone else’s approval.
• How I present myself is primarily for your satisfaction, not my own.
• My self-worth is tied to your opinion of my appearance, implying that I may not be enough as I am.

My young daughter will inevitably face an onslaught of societal pressures and unhealthy standards regarding beauty throughout her life. She already enjoys dressing up in fancy outfits and pretending to be older than she is, which I’m fine with—as long as she retains her spirited personality and continues to mix her glamorous princess attire with messy hair, sticky lips, and the inevitable dirt from outdoor play. If she views dressing up as fun and not as a societal expectation, I’m all for it.

Conversely, the song by Sofia Martinez promotes the idea of conforming to someone else’s ideals. The lyrics portray the singer as an object, emphasizing external validation over self-worth. The repeated refrain of “just wanna look good for you” suggests that the singer feels her own self-assessment is inadequate.

This notion, which is so pervasive in today’s media that it resonated with me only after hearing it in my daughter’s innocent voice, is not a belief I wish for my children to adopt. I’m not advocating for a boycott of Sofia Martinez; I understand the intent was likely to create a catchy song. My priority, however, is to foster confident children who value their own opinions and make choices that reflect their true selves.

Ultimately, the lesson here is the importance of recognizing and questioning detrimental messages in media. I want my children to learn that self-confidence holds more power than societal beauty standards. If my daughter chooses to invest time in her appearance, I hope it’s for her own enjoyment, with any external appreciation being a pleasant bonus. I also aspire for my son to understand that a woman who is self-assured and authentic is the most attractive of all.

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Summary:

This article discusses the impact of media messages on children, particularly focusing on how certain songs can promote unhealthy ideals about self-worth and beauty. The author emphasizes the need for parents to cultivate self-confidence in their children and to question the messages they encounter in popular culture. By fostering a sense of self-worth based on personal values rather than external validation, parents can help their children navigate societal pressures regarding appearance.