Well, it finally happened—the moment I’ve been dreading. My sweet daughter hopped off the school bus yesterday, complaining about my lack of creativity in her packed lunches. My first thought was, “Oh no, has she been scrolling through Pinterest?” My second thought was, “Time to update our parental controls to block Pinterest.”
It turns out some supermom (who undoubtedly has a Pinterest account) has been sending her kid to school with a lunchbox brimming with “love,” featuring Disney-themed dishes and adorable veggie art. And my daughter, Mia, has taken notice. Thanks a lot, mysterious mom. Thanks a LOT.
Mia informed me that on Wednesday, she watched her classmate, little Sophie, munch on a gluten-free, organic concoction shaped like an Elsa noodle braid while Mia sat there with a sad zip-lock bag of pretzels and a heavy dose of disappointment. Her tale really tugged at my heartstrings. So, like any guilt-ridden mom, I decided it was time to try this Bento Lunch thing.
I promised Mia an Olaf-themed lunch, but when I scanned the ingredient list—Japanese Nori noodles, purple seaweed, edible modeling clay—I was like, “Oh heck no!” Packing a lunch shouldn’t require a scavenger hunt through specialty shops and craft stores. Seriously, I haven’t shaved in four days, and that’s a priority before I start driving around town to find fancy food for my five-year-old to toss in the trash.
But I made a promise to her, so I jumped into Plan B. Unfortunately, I had no backup plan—at least not until I poured myself a couple glasses of 2009 Cabernet from Napa.
So, exhausted and not-so-perfect moms everywhere, I’d like to share my “Darn you, Sophie’s mom!” solution to this ridiculous, costly, and time-consuming trend:
The “I Ain’t Got Time for That—Here’s Some Lunch Money” Bento Box.
- Grab some lunch money from your purse.
- Arrange the cash and tape it down.
- Use a Sharpie to doodle a little something extra.
Forget about carving broccoli into tree shapes with “I love you!” painstakingly etched into their stalks with an X-Acto knife while juggling your blood pressure meds and trying to remember your mental health insurance co-pay. No thank you! Besides, unlike a scene from The Lion King made of graham crackers and caviar, my “I Ain’t Got Time for That” Bento Boxes serve as a straightforward way to communicate with your child:
- Addressing potty training issues
- Offering friendship advice
- Calling them out
I get it—the “I Ain’t Got Time for That” Bento Box still requires some effort on your part, which is something I usually avoid. But just imagine the look on your child’s face when they open their lunch box and see this:
Arachnophobia, cured: “Thanks, Mom!”
Ladies, even if your child doesn’t buy lunch, I’m here on my linoleum floor, begging you to ditch the melon baller and embrace the simple beauty of a square cheese sandwich. After all, you don’t need to earn a “MOM OF THE YEAR” title because, in your child’s eyes, you already have it.
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In summary, the Bento Box craze doesn’t have to stress you out. A simple note with lunch money can convey love and support just as well. Remember, you’re already doing great—don’t let Pinterest pressure get you down!