Please Don’t Suggest I Have a Second Child

Hey there, friends! So, picture this: I’m at the optometrist’s office, just finding out for the first time in my 30-something years that I need glasses. Meanwhile, my sweet little six-year-old is in the kiddie corner, asking for help with her Legos. Then, out of the blue, someone asks me, “Is she your only child?”

(Insert awkward pause.)

“Yep. Unless you count my husband, who’s basically a kid himself.”

Then comes the classic line: “Wow, what are you waiting for? She needs a sibling!”

Alright, listen up, folks. You really wanna know why I’m not having another child? It’s not just a simple choice. I almost lost my life bringing her into this world. If I were to put my already fragile heart under the strain of another pregnancy, I could face serious complications. There’s a real chance that both of us could be in jeopardy—my daughter could end up without a mother, and that’s a risk I’m not willing to take.

Trust me, I’ve rehearsed that explanation many times since 2008. Not exactly for auditions, but mostly for, well, people who should mind their own business.

Fast Forward to the Nail Salon

I know, I know, I shouldn’t have gone while my kiddo was in school. But there I am, and someone asks, “Do you have kids?”

“I have a six-year-old.”

“No more? Why not?”

Seriously? Because… go away.

What if I were to have another child and something tragic occurred? I know families who have experienced that pain, and I can’t even begin to fathom their heartache when faced with such questions.

At a Party for My Daughter’s Friends

Oh, and here we go again. I’m at a party for my daughter’s six-year-old friends, and there are 26 sugar-fueled kids bouncing off the walls. You try to make conversation, and the same question pops up: “Is she your only one? No siblings?”

Did you ever stop to think about how many women struggle with conceiving or maintaining a healthy pregnancy? Or maybe consider that we had financial troubles that turned our lives upside down while raising our little one? It might actually be a smart move to not dive deeper into emotional and financial chaos right now and save ourselves thousands of dollars by not having another child!

But yeah, because she “needs a playmate,” right?

My Personal Experience

So, are you still with me? Wanna know how I almost lost my life having my daughter? I was just 105 pounds at seven months pregnant, and after way too much terbutaline, I went into a code blue situation in the hospital. They had to revive me, baby in tow, and now I’m dealing with permanent heart valve damage and recurring heart issues. So, no thanks, I’d rather not risk it all just so my daughter can have a sibling.

Resources for Further Reading

If you want to read more about the journey of home insemination, check out this post on intracervicalinsemination.com. They’ve got some great insights! Also, if you’re navigating this path, makeamom.com is an awesome resource. And don’t forget to visit ASRM for more information on pregnancy and home insemination.

Conclusion

In summary, the decision to have another child is deeply personal and often complicated. It’s important to respect those choices and recognize the challenges that come with them.