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How Do We Grieve in the Digital Age?
It feels fitting to reflect on this topic, especially since I first connected with my friend, Sarah, through social media back in 2010—specifically on Twitter. Our conversations were often just snippets of thoughts shared in 140 characters, sometimes directed at each other, and at other times involving groups of friends. Eventually, we decided to take our online connection and meet up in person. That year, Sarah and I, along with a few other book lovers, started a series of lunch meetups. Dozens of people who might never have crossed paths otherwise came together over meals, forming friendships that flourished over the years.
Some of those friendships faded away, while others thrived. We all knew that Sarah was dealing with a serious illness, as she openly chronicled her battle with breast cancer on her blog. She wanted to ensure that others facing similar struggles felt seen and valued. Her posts radiated her core beliefs: a love for family, an appreciation for life’s beauty, and an unwavering commitment to helping others.
In 2013, Sarah calmly shared the devastating news that her cancer had returned, this time at Stage 4. I remember a dinner we shared that year—it was clear to me that it would be a final glimpse of her vibrant spirit. Despite the pain and fatigue she endured, she remained interested in everything around her, from her kids’ dinner preferences to my recent travels. Sarah embraced life to the fullest, and that was how she approached her illness as well.
Today, we are part of a generation that navigates the realities of loss through social media—not just through posts announcing death, but through the friendships that blossom in this digital landscape. When Sarah passed, many reached out to ask, “How well did you know her?” I had spent time with her at lunches and brunches, but I felt our bond transcended the typical measures of friendship.
The online world allows each of us to curate our own unique memories. One person might share a heartfelt message, while another posts a photo that seems more superficial. Grief doesn’t come with a measurement stick; it’s personal and varies from person to person. I believe that each interaction with Sarah was special, and while we can celebrate our shared experiences, the ones that we hold dear give depth to our collective mourning.
Last week, we lost Sarah, and she was a true friend. I wish everyone could have known her as I did. If you want to read more about the impact she had, check out this post on our blog about navigating relationships through loss.
In summary, our digital connections shape how we grieve, allowing us to express and share our feelings in unique ways. Whether through photos, memories, or simply the act of reaching out, we all have our own ways of remembering those we’ve lost. Sarah’s legacy will live on through the beauty she found in life and the connections she fostered.