25 Witty Comebacks for the Abercrombie & Fitch Sales Guy

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Whenever I step into Abercrombie & Fitch, I can always count on being greeted by one of their sharply dressed sales associates. This slick opening might seem cool between two trendy 19-year-olds, but it feels pretty off when it’s from a plaid-shirted guy to a yoga-pants-wearing mom in her forties. We all know it; my embarrassed kids definitely know it.

Most times, I try to ease the awkwardness with a casual, “Not much.” But honestly, there are so many other responses I wish I could throw out there. Here are some of my favorites:

1. Well, I’ve got a wedgie, I’m rushing to yoga, and I really should book a mammogram. What’s your story?
2. Since I added more fiber to my diet, let’s just say there’s been a lot going on.
3. Can you point me to your “plus size” section, please?
4. I’ll take a gin and tonic with a twist of lime, thanks!
5. Are you feeling as bummed as I am about Zayn leaving One Direction?
6. Running late on your electric bill again?
7. LOL! TTYL!
8. Could you turn up the music? I can’t feel the bass in my left kidney.
9. Why are you all up in my business?
10. Do you know where I can find some strong-smelling cheap cologne?
11. …and your mom jeans would be found where exactly?
12. Aren’t you going to ask for my ID?
13. Does this hoodie come in sizes for actual adults, or is it just for toddlers?
14. I’d love to browse, but I left my service dog at home.
15. Looks like you’ve got some funky gear here, for sure!
16. Did you catch Downton last night? Things are getting wild!
17. Want some help folding those shirts? They’re a little chaotic.
18. Sorry, but I’m taken.
19. ACTIVIAAAAAA!
20. What do you prefer: Toyota Sienna or Honda Odyssey?
21. “If I could turn back time…If I could find a way!”
22. 1996 just called; it wants its flannel shirt back. Oh, never mind.
23. Hold on, I’m looking for my Groupon. It’s around here somewhere.
24. I think I dated your dad in high school…or maybe it was just a drunken fling; I can’t remember.
25. Do you mean “What’s up?” Because “That’s what she said!”

This light-hearted take is perfect for those awkward moments at the mall! If you’re curious about more in-depth insights into home insemination, you can check out our other posts on privacy policies. And if you’re interested in fertility solutions, Make a Mom offers some great resources. Plus, for anyone looking into the first steps of IUI, this guide provides excellent information on what to expect.

In summary, these playful comebacks can spice up those obligatory retail interactions, turning awkwardness into humor.