Why We Let Our Grown Kids Stay Home

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Hey there! Let’s chat about why my partner and I have made the choice to let our adult children stick around the house a bit longer. You know the term “boomerang kids”? It usually describes young adults who move back in with their parents, often due to financial reasons. But what if those adult kids never really left in the first place? This could be seen as a “failure to launch,” a concept that highlights their struggle to break free and become fully independent.

In a recent article, I learned that today’s young adults, especially those born in the ’90s, are taking longer to hit those traditional milestones like finishing school, moving out, getting a job, marrying, and having kids. Maybe we need a new name for those who choose to stay at home while they pursue their higher education—how about “Fledglings”?

My partner and I faced our share of challenges during college, especially since we became parents early on. Juggling family life with school expenses was tough. We wanted to provide our kids with a different experience, so we started saving for their college funds when they were just little ones. Fast forward to now: our kids are 24 and 21 and have managed to avoid student debt, thanks to our planning. But guess what? They still live with us.

When I mention this to friends, I often find myself defending our choice. Here’s why we’re okay with it:

  1. We Have a Deal: Our kids can stay as long as they’re making progress in their studies. We cover their basic needs—like food and insurance—but they handle their personal expenses. Sure, there have been bumps in the road, but we think it’s better for them to focus on school without the added pressure of bills.
  2. Cultural Norms: In many cultures, multigenerational living is the norm. Families often rely on one another, creating a strong support network. Even though it’s just us and our kids, we maintain close ties with their grandparents, who live nearby. This kind of family structure fosters a sense of community, which is something we value.
  3. Financial Realities: Let’s break it down: If a college student works part-time at a low wage, housing costs can eat up a huge chunk of their income. When you factor in bills for essentials like food, cable, and Internet, it becomes clear that living independently can be financially overwhelming. We’d rather support our kids now so that they don’t have to worry about juggling jobs and classes.
  4. Aiming for a Better Future: We want to give our children the advantages we didn’t have—like graduating without debt. With the job market being what it is, it’s tough out there for young adults. Many are finishing school with little money and limited job prospects. We believe that supporting them now will help them launch into their careers free of financial burdens.

I know what some people might think: that we’re holding our kids back by allowing them to live at home. But honestly, both of our children have developed into independent adults who simply choose to call our place home. They have their own space upstairs, with a living area and bathroom, and they come and go as they please. In many ways, we feel like empty nesters already! This setup works for us, and it might just reflect a more communal approach to family life.

And if you’re curious about more parenting topics, check out our other posts like how to navigate home insemination kits. There’s also a fantastic resource for pregnancy and home insemination at News Medical that you might find useful. Plus, for all your home insemination needs, make sure to visit BabyMaker for their top-notch kits.

To sum it up, we’re choosing to support our kids during this transitional phase in their lives, and it feels like the right call for our family.