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My Partner Has No Clue What It’s Like to Be Me
You know, I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve heard friends or even found myself saying, “My partner has no idea what it’s like to be at home with the kids.” Back when I was juggling a full-time job while pregnant, then balancing work and motherhood, I often vented about how my husband just “didn’t get it.” And truthfully, he didn’t.
He doesn’t really understand my daily routine, just like I can’t fully grasp what his work life entails. Our roles are like a mystery to each other. He can’t find the peanut butter or where the extra towels are stored, and our little one always seems to be in pajamas when she’s with him. I can’t help but think he doesn’t quite know how to get her dressed. Plus, when I come home, she’s usually missing a sock, the air is filled with the aroma of chicken fingers and who knows what else, and the boys are all sweaty from their wrestling matches.
I used to get frustrated because he didn’t handle things the way I would. If I were home, there definitely wouldn’t be any lingering smells or chaotic playtime. But after I left my job to be with the kids full-time, I found myself so relieved to have a break that I stopped caring about the mess. Now, I feel a deep sense of gratitude toward him for being our provider, and he appreciates everything I do—even if he’s not entirely sure what that all involves, which might be why he’s so thankful.
But still… he has no idea.
He doesn’t know how much coffee I rely on. He has no clue what it’s like to run errands with three kids in tow. He can’t imagine changing a tampon with an audience. He’s unaware of how isolating and overwhelming it can feel on tough days when I could really use an extra set of hands. He hasn’t experienced the frustration of watching my body change three times over with little control.
He has no idea how much joy he brings me. It’s something I struggle to express. He doesn’t realize how grateful I am for his unwavering love, even as he sees more of my flaws year after year. He has no idea how fortunate I feel to witness our children’s lives firsthand every single day—thanks to him, I get to be in that front-row seat.
He might not understand how challenging it can be to be me, but he also doesn’t know how incredible it is. So here’s to my husband, who has no real grasp on what it’s like to stay home with our kids… thank you. I think we often forget to express gratitude to those we love most, despite the crazy behavior we sometimes exhibit.
For more insights on parenting and relationships, check out this resource on intrauterine insemination and explore this amazing guide on home insemination kits. And if you’re interested in more discussions like this, take a look at our post about home insemination.
Summary
Balancing motherhood and partnership can sometimes feel isolating. While our partners may not fully understand the daily challenges we face at home, it’s essential to express gratitude for their contributions. By sharing our experiences, we bridge the gap of understanding and appreciate the roles we each play in our family dynamics.