Back to School: A Look at the 1970s vs. Today

Back to School, 1970s

1. It’s the last week of August, and time to take the kiddos downtown for some back-to-school shopping. Hit up Sears for new clothes: a pair of corduroys and a striped tee for each child. The boys get dungarees, while the girls snag culottes. No, sweetheart, you can’t have that bright orange and red poncho. I promise I’ll crochet you a better one with way more fringe. Grab some of that fuzzy rainbow yarn for the girls’ hair, and you’re done—total spent: $43. Afterward, treat everyone to grilled cheese sandwiches and chocolate milk at Woolworth’s.
2. The night before school starts (which is always the Sunday after Labor Day, right in mid-September), stuff the kids into the back of the station wagon and make a beeline for Eckerds or K-Mart. Hurry them to the back-to-school section to pick out a lunchbox. Remind them that decisions can’t take all night because bedtime is at eight, and they’ll miss their favorite shows if they dawdle. If Kimberly can’t choose between Holly Hobbie and The Bionic Woman, you’ll just have to pick “Pigs in Space” for her—no arguing! Don’t forget a composition book and a pack of pencils, and remember to save some grocery bags for covering textbooks.
3. On your way out, grab a pack of Virginia Slims and enjoy a few on the drive home.
4. Morning comes, and you brew a cup of Sanka with Sweet ‘n’ Low. Line up the lunchboxes on the kitchen’s Formica countertop and set up an assembly line.
5. Lay down yellow mustard on the bread, stack on bologna, and add American cheese slices. Wrap those sandwiches up tightly in foil or wax paper and toss them into the lunchboxes. Each child gets the same lunch—no exceptions.
6. Alternatives for the sandwiches could include peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and marshmallow fluff, leftover roast beef, or the classic tuna salad loaded with onions and celery.
7. Toss some Planter’s Cheese Balls in a baggie and secure it with a twist tie.
8. Pull out Twinkies and put one in each lunchbox.
9. Fill thermoses with Kool-Aid or whole milk.
10. Toss in a red delicious apple, even though you know it’ll come back home uneaten (and that’s fine; you can keep rotating the same one).
11. Close those lunchboxes up and let the kids grab them along with a frosted Pop-Tart on their way to the bus stop. Crank up some Barry Manilow and celebrate having a little peace until dinner.

Back to School, Today

1. Take a few deep breaths and repeat a positive mantra. There’s still time before school starts, so no stress about ordering BPA-free bento boxes or eco-friendly Indian tiffins made without child labor. Thanks to Amazon Prime, you can get everything with two-day shipping, plus you can read all those reviews while the kids are at summer “camp,” which is really just another word for school because, let’s face it, you were exhausted that day they were home with you.
2. Fast forward a week: the bento boxes have arrived, along with your child’s school’s ridiculously long supply list—three and a half pages, including a ten-pound bag of flour and a Costco-sized pack of toilet paper.
3. Begin a frantic online search for backpacks made from organic materials, ensuring they’re still trendy. Don’t forget to have them monogrammed!
4. Hit the mall for new school clothes. You’ll end up spending $2,387.07 at Gymboree and Crew Cuts, all on credit.
5. Schedule a session with a child psychologist to help your little ones transition to a new grade and teacher.
6. Review the allergy list the school provided, which details what not to pack in your child’s lunch. It’s stressful—nobody wants to be responsible for an allergic reaction.
7. Purchase school supplies that are separate from the classroom supply list. They’ll need paper, pens, folders, notebooks, a calligraphy set, and maybe even a centrifuge.
8. Grocery shopping for lunch items at Whole Foods will take about four hours—every label gets scrutinized to ensure you buy organic, non-GMO, gluten-free, allergy-friendly products. You leave with tahini, bananas, and brown rice cakes, spending $76.19.
9. The night before school starts, prepare those bento boxes with organic strawberries shaped like sea creatures and a sandwich made from vegan hemp bread filled with tahini and kale. Make flowers from non-dairy cheese and olives. Snap a pic for Instagram before closing the boxes.
10. Write your child an encouraging note with a motivational quote.
11. Add some stickers for a fun bonus.
12. Fill a water bottle with filtered water and throw in a box of coconut water—hydration is key, right?
13. Blog about your back-to-school preparations in hopes of going viral.
14. On the first day of school, wake up at 4 AM to create signs for the kids to hold for photos on the front step. Make a festive banner to hang above the door, and blow up some balloons.
15. Whip up pancakes shaped like letters.
16. Dress the kids in matching outfits and spend half an hour snapping pictures.
17. Load everyone into the car and drive them to school.
18. After dropping them off, return to your car for a good cry for twenty minutes. But don’t worry, you’ll be back in six hours to pick them up for their afternoon activities like synchronized swimming, cello, and Urdu classes.

home insemination Kit

In summary, the back-to-school experience has dramatically evolved from the straightforward and budget-friendly 1970s to the complex, high-stakes preparation of today’s parents. From simple lunches to trendy bento boxes, it’s clear that the pressure to create the perfect back-to-school experience is greater than ever.

For more insights into navigating parenthood, check out this other blog post or explore this helpful resource for all things pregnancy and home insemination. Also, if you want to boost your fertility, you might want to visit Make A Mom.